A WOMAN preparing for a night out has entered the third day of applying and redoing her winged eyeliner.
Lauren, not her real name, began applying makeup to her eyelids three days ago, and has remained in an endless loop of carefully drawing on her eyeliner, wiping it away and trying again ever since.
She said: “I know from experience that putting on eyeliner can take a while, so I gave myself plenty of time. Unfortunately I’ve overrun by 71 hours.
“In theory it shouldn’t take too long. Once I’ve mapped out the wings with a couple of flicks, it’s simply a case of joining them together. As you can see from where I’ve punched the wall out of frustration though, the reality is more complicated.
“To get that perfect cat-eye look, you need the steady hands of a heart surgeon. But by day two I was getting cramp and losing my grip on the brush. Sure, I could ask my housemate to draw them on in seconds, but that would be admitting defeat.
“It’ll be worth the effort though once I’ve evened them out. We’re going to a dingy underground bar where nobody will be able to notice my eyeliner anyway. Can’t wait.”
Friend Hannah, not her real name, said: “Shit, sounds like Lauren’s nearly ready. I’m still plucking my eyebrows, but if I hurry I’ll only be fashionably late by 48 hours.”