Cruise Holidays

Sam Catling lived the dream by ditching a supermarket job for a supposedly fun role as a cruise ship entertainer. He opens up about his day to day life on a cruise ship, the long hours he worked, and how much he took home each month

Working on a cruise ship is the kind of job everyone fantasises about now and again. And when Sam Catling was just 18, he landed what many people would consider a dream role – a cruise ship entertainer.

Sam, now 38, now shares his memories of his time at sea, as well as interviewing others from across the maritime industry in his podcast Deck Tales, and he’s even written a book, Seems Like Smooth Sailing, that gives an unflinching account of what it’s like to work at sea for months on end.

He jokingly refers to himself as a former ‘trolley wally’ and says his CV consisted of a paper round and a job collecting trollies at Asda when family members suggested he’d be a great cruise ship entertainer. His mum and granny had just come back from a cruise and had chatted to onboard entertainers about how they got into the role, before suggesting the idea to the outgoing Sam.

He spoke about how he managed to land the role, despite his lack of previous boating experience: “I used to get The Stage magazine delivered to my newsagent on a weekly basis, and I kept looking through the ads, and eventually I saw one that said ‘now receiving applications for entertainment hosts’ so I applied.

“The first question was ‘What previous experience do you have working in entertainment?’, and eventually I wrote ‘Ive had extensive experience pushing trolleys around Asda car park for the past two years’.”

With a drama GCSE and a few workshops under his belt, Sam soon found himself in Gibraltar on a boat that was in dry dock, attending two weeks of rehearsals as the ship was refurbished. In addition to entertainers such as himself, who did events from game shows to karaoke, there were a show team with West End-style performers who Sam said were a “triple threat” with dancing, singing, and acting skills.

The job was gruelling, with Sam revealing he worked seven days a week. Visits home were extremely rare, crew stayed on the ship the duration of their contracts, which for Sam’s first cruise was six months. The days were long too, with Sam admitting he became “quite the social drinker” due to his schedules requiring him to sit down and socialise with guests.

His shifts would often finish past midnight, and he’d head to the crew bar after work until 2am, before getting up at 7am to face the next day. Sam said he became skilled at power napping: “Between your different activities that you’d host I was down in my cabin having a power nap. If I had an indoor cabin I’d just close the door and you were in pitch black darkness, so it was really easy to just have a 30 minute nap.” But he admitted: “You wouldn’t know what time of day it was because you’re cutting out all the sunlight.”

His accommodation was included, as was food and expenses, and Sam said: “You’re not paying rent, your food’s taken care of, you’ve no heating and electric and gas bills and all of that stuff. It’s all taken care of, which is nice! You don’t have to worry about all those things. But then you are spending money when you go ashore, you know, going to eat out, because after a couple of weeks of being on board you are sick of the food.”

Sam revealed that, when he worked on ships around 2006, he was taking home about £1,200 to £1,300 a month from working seven days a week. Accommodation was shared, and Sam said only managers and the top talent such as the main singers in the shows would get their own cabins.

Despite this salary being representative of a job over 20 years ago, cruise ships don’t pay much more now. According to career site prospects.ac.uk, which advises students on employment routes, those with little experience shouldn’t expect big money for their long hours: “Entry-level cruise ship jobs, such as hospitality, housekeeping, retail, or waiting staff positions, typically pay around £1,000 to £1,500 per month, often with accommodation and meals included.”

But it claims that experienced crew can get decent salaries at sea: “With experience and progression into specialist or management roles, salaries can rise to between £2,000 and £4,000 per month. Senior officers, entertainment managers, engineers, and technical staff may earn considerably more.”

Sam worked on cruise ships for four years, and nowadays he runs his podcast, which he describes as his “passion” with over 60 episodes available, as well as taking on handyman jobs and occasionally working as a TV extra.

“I want to continue doing this until I’m an old man, because there’s 70% of the planet that’s covered in ocean, so I don’t think I’m going to run out of guests anytime soon. The podcast started with just being a platform for cruise ship crew, but now it’s something else. It’s cargo ship captains, I’ve spoken to a pirate, I’ve had a deep sea salvage scuba diver and tugboat captains.”

He added: “I just really wanted to drill down into something unique and authentic, and within a specific niche that people might not know about; the stories at sea that most people don’t hear. The public might not have an interest in ships, but people are still people, and the stories that happen at sea are there for everyone to hear about.”

Listen to Sam’s Deck Tales podcast here.

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With their unique adults-only approach to cruising, Virgin Voyages is attracting a whole new generation of cruisers

If you’d asked me a few years ago to go on a cruise, it’s fair to say I’d be apprehensive. The idea of being trapped on a floating Butlin’s, pushing past screaming toddlers to reach the lukewarm buffet, wasn’t exactly my idea of a relaxing holiday. Then I heard about Virgin Voyages : no kids, no buffets, and the few people I knew that’d tried it raved about it.

Billed by the company as an adults-only boutique hotel at sea, Richard Branson’s cruise line has won multiple awards since it launched in 2021, as well as amassing a loyal fanbase.

I thought it was time to see if I could become one of those fans, could I finally be a cruise person? I embarked on one of Virgin Voyages’ sailings from Portsmouth, an easy 90-minute drive from my home in Oxfordshire.

This wasn’t just any cruise though, this was one of the company’s specialty comedy cruises – promising top acts from across the UK, all included in your fare.

I have to say, the standard of names was well above what I expected for a cruise ship. Headliners included Celebrity Traitors star Lucy Beaumont, Gogglebox regular Babatunde Aleshé and I’m A Celebrity all-star Seann Walsh, to name a few. All of the comedy shows were excellent, but my standout has to be Matt Richardson, of Xtra Factor fame. His show was genuinely one of the funniest things I’d ever seen, and had the audience in hysterics.

This was all offered alongside Virgin’s regular entertainment offering, which includes bingo with the ship’s resident drag queen, cabaret shows and gameshows – one of which even had a prize from the on-board tattoo parlour.

A tattoo parlour at sea pretty much sums up the whole design and vibes of the ship. Stepping onboard is like walking into a chic beach club in Ibiza. We entered our balcony cabin, and within a few minutes I was sitting in the iconic Virgin Voyages hammock with a glass of champagne. Not bad for a cruise sceptic.

The Valiant Lady may only be five years old, but it’s already had a refurb with refreshed seating areas, menus and a brand new restaurant.

At the very back of the ship sits The Dock, an outdoor lounge and casual small plates eatery that feels extremely relaxed. Forget clunky plastic sunloungers, here you sink into comfortable modern seats and huge beds and look out to the incredible views.

It was here that I started to think ‘I could get used to this’, as a helpful waiter handed me my third sangria and delivered our snacks. Think charred octopus and hanger steak, all included in the fare.

That brings me to one thing I’d heard about cruising – ‘it’s a constant sales pitch’. That may be the case on other cruise lines, but based on what I experienced, it could not be further from the truth on Virgin.

Standard WiFi and soft drinks are free, and every single restaurant on board is included. The majority of dishes are included in the fare, although some venues have one or two premium menu items at an extra cost. We never felt compelled to try these as there were so many appealing options which were included.

In fact, the food is one point that I heard so much about. Replacing the traditional buffet, you have The Galley, a food market style venue with multiple cuisines offered – all made to order. Imagine lots of street food stalls, including tacos, burgers and sushi.

Then there are the sit-down restaurants, which feel like trendy London eateries that I’d genuinely want to eat at on land. There’s no traditional ‘main dining room’ here, and no strict dress code to boot.

Highlights on-board included Ariya, the new Indian restaurant which, for me, blew Dishoom out of the water with its tender lamb shank biryani, and The Wake, a high-end steak restaurant nestled at the bottom of a glamorous, cascading staircase.

There were, of course, things I didn’t love. The pool area is relatively small, and although not an issue on our chilly UK cruise, I could see it becoming more of an issue on a sunnier trip.

There is honestly so much more I could write about this ship. I haven’t even touched on the spectacular Scarlet Night, where the entire ship transforms into a massive bright-red pool party.

I left this holiday feeling fully converted into a ‘cruise person’, so much so that I even booked two more trips before we pulled back into Portsmouth.

If you’ve spent your whole life swearing you’d never set foot on a cruise ship, it might just be time to eat your words. I certainly did, and luckily, the food was spectacular.