Sailing

Swimming ashore from the boat I can see a narrow shingle beach covered in driftwood. There are logs, bamboo canes and the sundried planks of an old shipwreck. The steep climb up the hill behind is not easy. I skirt thick clumps of thorn and abandoned ancient olive trees, scrambling over jagged outcrops of limestone. Every time I curl my fingers into a rocky niche I think about snakes. The only residents, however, are spiders. Their webs are strung between the trees, and so thick and strong that I grab a stick to slash through them. No one has been here for a long time.

Near the hilltop I stumble on a ruined stone building. Who lived here, I wonder? And where have they gone? A few steps further and the land abruptly ends in a vertical white cliff that plummets into an improbably blue sea. Far away, in the haze, there is a stack of Ionian islands and one of them, I know, must be Ithaca.

At that moment I feel footsteps running across my forehead and let out an involuntary scream. An arachnid Achilles has come to take revenge. I leap up, arms flailing. The eight-legged hero heads for the underworld of my left armpit.

In the original epic tales of human adventure, the action starts in the middle of the story, a rule first identified by the Roman poet Horace. At that central moment our protagonist is in a terrible state: probably lost at sea, often naked, and always alone. We want to know: how did things get to this nadir, and where will they go now? It’s a pattern repeated over and over. Take, for example, that ancient classic The Bourne Identity, a 2002 film starring Matt Damon, who appears in the opening sequences floating in the Med like a stunned octopus. He doesn’t even know who he is, but with the hospitality of strangers and cathartic bouts of extreme violence, he inches towards his happy place.

Now Matt gets to do it all again, in a pleated skirt and bronze helmet, appearing as Odysseus in Christopher Nolan’s The Odyssey, a $250m blockbuster due for release on 17 July in the UK and US and starring almost every deity in the Hollywood heavens. Go back to the literary Odysseus, however (with Emily Wilson’s brilliant recent translation), and he is much more than a Hollywood action hero. This home-loving husband is also a pathological liar, serial philanderer, murderer, carpenter and, most famously, a traveller. And like all travellers, sitting around the campfire at some later date with listeners agog, he is forced to confront the thorny problem of how to convey the full visceral impact of what happened on his journey and hold his audience. Traditionally, there are two options: the full truth, or the fuller truth.

Back on the clifftop, tickled to death by Achilles, I dive into the improbably blue sea only to find that my assailant has become a six-headed monster that’s dragging me towards a giant whirlpool. And I’ve lost my glasses.

I had come a few days earlier to the Greek mainland and set sail for Ithaca. This is actually easier than it might seem. First, track down a friend with the correct sailing credentials (or get them yourself at the Royal Yachting Association), then gather a crew and search out a boat. Alternatively, pay the extra and hire a skipper. We sailed with Neilson Holidays, which has a mainland base near Palairos on the Ionian Sea. Depending on experience and qualifications, you can either follow a flotilla or go it alone. We arrive and find our boat, Cafard, which my multilingual skipper friend, Fabian, translates as Depressed Cockroach. I wonder if it’s a misspelling of Cavafy (Constantine P), the Greek poet who wrote:

When you set out for Ithaca
Ask that your way be long,
Full of adventure, full of instruction

We stock up and set sail. Adventure and instruction is our hope. My wife, Sophie, has never sailed before and is scoffing seasickness tablets faster than Odysseus’s men gobbled down the sun god’s cattle, and that did not end well. Can we discover a Homeric sense of wonder and novelty on our voyage to Ithaca? And report back truthfully?

Despite the yacht name, the beginning is auspicious. Leaving Palairos we sail into a pod of dolphins, swarming around the bows, close enough to make eye contact. That night is spent on Kalamos, a steep-sided wooded island with a tiny port. In the taverna, cats stretch out under chairs where old men are making a glass of ouzo stretch out too. There is talk of a crashed military drone found by fishermen in a sea cave north of here. The engine was still running and there were 100kg of explosives on board. Is this story also getting stretched a little, I wonder? Or is it connected to the presence of unfriendly Russians on some islands, hiding behind warning signs for savage dogs? Odysseus would not like that. He was fine-tuned to any abuse of hospitality, and perhaps a tad oversensitive when it came to other men flirting with his wife.

The next morning we sail out, stopping at Porto Leone, a village on Kalamos abandoned after the 1953 earthquake. The plan is to stop again at the island of Atokos, where wild pigs reputedly swim off the beach, but the wind picks up and we are properly smashing through the waves. Fabian is loving it. Sophie, amazed not to feel seasick, is letting out shrieks of joy.

We head for Kioni on Ithaca, little more than a scattering of old houses around an exquisite harbour. In August, I’m told, the berths are all taken before lunchtime. The waterfront is a lovely mix: a corner shop that stocks everything, a top-notch bakery, tavernas and some swish boutiques all tied together with colourful plumes of bougainvillaea. In one arty studio, a yachtie with auburn hair and a regal manner is demanding the price of a swordfish sculpture.

“It’s €15,000,” purrs the assistant.

Not everything is so pricey: we find that a good dinner with wine can be had for less than €25 each.

The next day, I walk some of the island’s footpaths, a network that badly needs a strimmer. In the town of Stavros, the tiny museum holds an astonishing array of Homeric treasure that was found in a nearby cave: a second-century BC shard of pottery bearing the inscription “pray to Odysseus” and several pieces of bronze tripod cauldron dated to the ninth century BC. In local minds these are some of the Phaeacian gifts mentioned in The Odyssey.

A mile further up the trail, at a site known as the School of Homer, are the ruins of what may have been a palace – sufficient evidence for locals to build a model in Stavros town square and confidently identify the bedroom of Odysseus. Listen closely and you can almost hear him: “Honestly Penelope, they both bewitched me. I was a sex slave. I couldn’t wait to get home.” The tradition of Odyssean tall tale-telling is in robust good health.

In the highly recommended Margarita Cafe there is another fine tradition on display: cakes. The local speciality is rovani, a delicious spicy concoction served with ice-cream.

Our voyage takes in Kefalonia and the noisy mainland port of Sivota, but the highlight comes with that lonely anchorage off the mysterious island of Meganisi. Parts of the Ionian coast are undergoing a building boom – glass and concrete palaces spreading across the hillsides like a nasty rash. But here we find tranquillity: snorkelling through shoals of fish, exploring vast sea caves and raising a toast to that magnificent poet Homer, and the inspiration he has given to so many for almost three millennia. After a week on the water, we sail back to Palairos. We have all had a great time, even the nervous first-time mariner. I leave with vivid memories, not least that desperate underwater struggle with the deadly spider woman who stole my glasses.

The trip was provided by Neilson Holidays: a seven-day South Ionian flotilla cruise from £595pp (for four adults) including flights from Gatwick; skippered boat from £1,145pp. Travel to London was provided by LNER and accommodation for a trip to the British Museum’s Ancient Greece section by Radisson Blu Bloomsbury

As technology becomes more and more advanced and accessible to people, cruise ships have to put rules in place to make sure passengers are safe, and their privacy is protected

People are being warned that they could be fined or kicked off a cruise ship they’re a passenger on for wearing 1 luxury item when onboard. Several cruise companies have introduced a number of new rules in 2026 to ensure the safety of passengers travelling on board.

As technology continues to advance and people snap up the latest gadgets, cruise operators are keeping their policies up to date to safeguard holidaymakers and protect their privacy while travelling at sea. Whether you’re sailing with Disney, Virgin, P&O or Fred. Olsen., each cruise liner has their own set of rules that could land passengers in trouble.

Don and Heidi, a couple who have clocked up 100 cruises between them, regularly share updates and handy tips on TikTok, and have been keeping a close watch on shifting cruise policies over recent months.

With the rise of people wearing smart glasses, such as the very popular Meta Glasses, cruise ships have been forced to take steps to protect their passenger’s privacy when they’re traveling on cruise liners.

Don said: “Cruise lines are instituting new policies and in 2026, these behaviours will get you fined, banned, or removed from the ship entirely.

“One, recording other passengers without their consent using technology like Meta Glasses is a serious violation of privacy policies and fellow cruisers are reporting it.”

One of the cruise companies who has banned the items is Royal Caribbean who quietly updated its prohibited items list to tighten onboard safety and cybersecurity.

Recently, Royal Caribbean updated the verbiage on its prohibited items list to read: “‘Smart’ glasses from any of several manufacturers that can record video and audio are not allowed to be used in certain areas onboard the ship, including, but not limited to, public restrooms, Youth Program areas, medical areas, as well as the casino.”

Royal Carrabian’s app confirmed that if a guest fails to abide by the policy, the chief security officer and captain are authorized to confiscate the smart glasses.

Don continued: “Two, flying a drone from the ship is banned on nearly every cruise line. Get caught launching one and you’ll be escorted off at the next port.

“Three, fights on cruise ships are all over the news and lines are done looking the other way. Passengers involved in physical altercations are now being banned from certain cruise lines for life.

“Four, getting caught with prohibited items in checked luggage and you get escorted to a security meeting. Try to bring something more serious on board and you could be handed over to authorities at the next port.

“Five, this isn’t optional. It’s international maritime law. Skip the muster drill and crew will track you down to complete it. Refuse entirely and you’ll be removed from the ship before a set sail.

“Six, lighting up on your balcony, in your cabin, or anywhere else outside the designated smoking areas can get you fined and repeat violations can get you escorted off the ship.

“This includes vaping. Don’t forget to share this one with your cruise mates for your next sailing.”

Several cruise lines have introduced new passenger rules in 2026 – and if these are broken, passengers could be fined, removed or even handed a lifetime ban from the ship

Several cruise companies have introduced a raft of new rules in 2026 to ensure the safety of passengers travelling on board — but those who break them could find themselves thrown off the ship. As technology continues to advance and people snap up the latest gadgets, cruise operators are keeping their policies up to date to safeguard holidaymakers and protect their privacy while travelling at sea.

There is a comprehensive list of regulations that passengers must adhere to when sailing with cruise operators including Disney, Virgin, P&O and Fred. Olsen. Should any of these rules be breached, travellers could face a formal warning, a financial penalty, or even be removed from the vessel and handed a lifetime ban.

Don and Heidi, a couple who have clocked up 100 cruises between them, regularly share updates and handy tips on TikTok, and have been keeping a close watch on shifting cruise policies over recent months.

Don said: “Cruise lines are instituting new policies and in 2026, these behaviours will get you fined, banned, or removed from the ship entirely.

“One, recording other passengers without their consent using technology like Meta Glasses is a serious violation of privacy policies and fellow cruisers are reporting it.

“Two, flying a drone from the ship is banned on nearly every cruise line. Get caught launching one and you’ll be escorted off at the next port.

“Three, fights on cruise ships are all over the news and lines are done looking the other way. Passengers involved in physical altercations are now being banned from certain cruise lines for life.”

The couple behind the video also used the chance to explain what happens when passengers break three longstanding cruise ship regulations – smoking violations, missing the muster drill, and attempting to smuggle prohibited items aboard.

Don said: “Four, getting caught with prohibited items in checked luggage and you get escorted to a security meeting. Try to bring something more serious on board and you could be handed over to authorities at the next port.

“Five, this isn’t optional. It’s international maritime law. Skip the muster drill and crew will track you down to complete it. Refuse entirely and you’ll be removed from the ship before a set sail.

“Six, lighting up on your balcony, in your cabin, or anywhere else outside the designated smoking areas can get you fined and repeat violations can get you escorted off the ship.

“This includes vaping. Don’t forget to share this one with your cruise mates for your next sailing.”