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AFTER my sixth glass of wine, the boat began to rock – the first time in three days I felt like I was on the water.

Cruising down France’s majestic River Loire on board CroisiEurope’s Loire Princesse, I had to put it down to my slightly tipsy state, as until then, the unique long, low vessel had drifted along peacefully for the entire voyage.

The ship has side-mounted paddle wheels and is designed to sail on France’s last wild river, known for its shallowness.

There’s a relaxed atmosphere on board, and unlike its ocean-going cousins, the Loire Princesse has a vibe that’s all about enjoying the slower pace   —   eating, drinking and snoozing as you pass through stunning scenery.

I joined the four-night Croisi-Europe sailing just a day after my 30th birthday and the gentle pace of the cruise was exactly what I needed after big celebrations back in London.

If you thought river cruises were for older folks you’d largely be right — I was the youngest person on board by about 20 years.

WAIL OF A TIME

I drove Irish Route 66 with deserted golden beaches and pirate-like islands

TEMPTED?

Tiny ‘Bali of Europe’ town with stunning beaches, €3 cocktails and £20 flights

But that is not to say it was sedate — there was an open bar and at dinner my glass was constantly topped up.

Servers eventually just left entire bottles of red on our table.

The Loire Princesse took us from Nantes to Saint-Nazaire on the west coast and back again.

And Nantes, the sixth largest French city, was a highlight of the trip.

Just an hour’s flight from London, it is the perfect weekend getaway destination, with all the charm of a French city without the bustle of Paris or the remoteness of Provence.

With clean, cobbled streets, Nantes is home to plenty of exiles from Paris looking for a cheaper, quieter life, and the city feels like a mini version of it.

From July to September, follow the Green Line, or Le Voyage à Nantes — literally painted on to the pavement, it leads you through the city to discover hidden street art, pop-up installations and all the best viewing points, without needing a map.

Another arty must-do is Les Machines de I’île — unique steampunk-like artistic projects inspired by the fantasy worlds of 19th-century writer Jules Verne, who was born in Nantes.

The Grand Elephant is a 40ft mechanical jumbo made of wood and steel that walks across the quay at the city’s former shipyards, trumpeting and spraying water at unsuspecting onlookers.

You can even ride inside it.

And you can admire Le Carrousel des Mondes Marins — a giant, three-storey carousel filled with mechanical sea monsters which you can operate yourself.

And I am sure you’ll be inspired to create something beautiful yourself after a tipple or two in the Loire Valley.

The region is home to its own variety of vino — Muscadet — grown at the western end of the valley.

Muscadet is a dry, crisp white and is currently going through a bit of a renaissance, so an opportunity to visit one of the world-class wineries in the region is an absolute must.

On my trip, there were three day-trip excursions from the cruise, one of which was included in the price of the voyage, the others costing around £68 each.

In one day-long excursion from the cruise we travelled south of Nantes to the beautiful vineyard of Cassemichere.

Rather dramatically, our guide told us how the vintner’s brother had died just three weeks earlier, after opening a tank and being poisoned by the carbon dioxide flowing out.

Like the bizarre plot of some twisted nursery rhyme, the poor man had then fallen into the wine.

But I didn’t let that put me off the tasting, and I can confirm that the white made at Cassemichere pairs well with seafood.

We also visited nearby Clisson, a medieval village known for its unique Italian-inspired architecture, with a charming river flowing through the middle of it.

Clisson is the kind of place they stick on the front of the tourist brochure — large trees hanging over the flowing water with an old bridge to cross it.

It was full of history as well, and with typical French frankness, our guide told us how, in the 18th century, women had been boiled at the castle during the Revolution.

On another day trip from the boat we visited two gorgeous chateaus in the centre of the Loire Valley.

The beautiful homes are now museums, with manicured gardens which were lovely to walk around on a blue-sky day.

Each day trip came with a three-course lunch and again, plenty of wine.

At the Chateau de Villandry — a world heritage site — we ate a beautiful chicken lunch in a spot where weddings are hosted.

After all that wine and food I was in desperate need of a nap when we got back to the boat.

Luckily for us, the rooms were cleaned every day, had a sizeable bathroom and were quiet.

Cabins on the upper deck have balconies, while those on the main deck have picture windows to watch the scenery glide by.

When it came to the evening’s festivities, an intercom in our room would call us to the lounge, where we would enjoy several pre-dinner drinks.

Then, in a nice touch by staff, we would have our dinner menu announced to us.

As with the included breakfast and lunch, dinner was an à-la-carte affair.

Think refined French comfort food — plenty taking inspiration from the surrounding Loire region, including fresh seafood and local cheeses.

And, of course, the wine flowed freely — particularly the Muscadet, which was available every night with whatever dish.

In summer months, the ship’s sun deck with its deck chairs and sun loungers is the perfect place to enjoy another cheeky glass while soaking up the sun.

With its access to stunning cities and chateaus, fine food and wine, river cruises don’t only appeal to the older lot on board.

From now on I am a convert too — and got the boat rocking!

INVESTIGATORS think Towie star Jake Hall died from a horror chest injury caused by broken glass.

Jake, 35, suffered head wounds after allegedly turning aggressive and trying to harm himself during a party at the £200-a-night Majorcan villa he was renting.

Sources close to the investigation said the worst injury the reality star suffered was a chest wound from a shard of glass after smashing into a door.

The insider said: “The thorax injury was the one emergency responders at the scene felt was the most traumatic one and most likely to have been fatal.”

Jake’s autopsy is expected to take place today in the Majorcan capital Palma, but the results will not be publicly released.

Finding a revolutionary artist during cocktail hour at the opening gala of Los Angeles County Museum of Art’s new David Geffen Galleries was like shooting fish in a barrel.

Gaze over the rim of your glass to notice Jeff Koons and Ed Ruscha talking closely beside the DJ booth. Mark Bradford strides by with a beneficent smile — towering over everyone, including AI art maker Refik Anadol. Todd Gray, whose 27-foot-long photo sculpture “Octavia’s Gaze” graces the hallway near the building’s south entrance, chats with Wim Wenders, who is making a documentary about architect Peter Zumthor’s controversial new $724 million concrete behemoth. Zumthor is there too — in bright red sneakers — talking to LACMA director and chief executive Michael Govan before Govan turns to take a selfie with immersive installation artist Do Ho Suh.

Jeff Koons, left, talks with Ed Ruscha at the opening gala for LACMA’s new David Geffen Galleries on Thursday.

(Jessica Gelt / Los Angeles Times)

Lauren Halsey walks by in her distinctive white shirt, long shorts and ball cap, beset on all sides by friends and admirers.

“It’s beautiful, it’s fantastic,” she said of Zumthor’s creation.

It’s an artist’s world on this breezy evening, as the sun sets golden over the looming gray concrete of the building, and the lights that gird the structure’s underbelly flicker on and twinkle like stars overhead. In this milieu, Hollywood A-listers like Will Ferrell and Sharon Stone, who occupy separate cliques nearby, pale in comparison to the mingling artistic luminaries.

Architect Peter Zumthor, left, and Michael Govan attend LACMA’s opening gala for the David Geffen Galleries. Govan said he hopes the building lasts 500 years.

(Gina Ferazzi / Los Angeles Times)

“It’s ready for us,” Bradford said of the building. “It’s ready for artists. I walked in and I was overwhelmed with a space that was made for us, and I can’t wait for everything I can do.”

“Snazzy. Does the job,” said Ruscha, looking bemused and speaking in short bursts of headline-style phrases like one of his famous paintings.

Gray said he was glad to see his art during “magic hour,” noting how the setting sun shone warm through the building’s glass windows — diffused by textile designer Reiko Sudo’s chromium spattered curtains — to imbue his photo installation with a distinctive warmth.

“I’ve never seen it at dusk,” Gray said with a smile. “It was a totally different experience to see it at that time of day. And [the light was] actually yellow, so the piece changed … and the concrete warmed up because of that warmer light. It was a lovely chromatic experience, which is wonderful because then you’re aware that you’re experiencing something in a very particular space and time.”

James Goldstein, the owner of architect John Lautner’s famed Sheats-Goldstein Residence, which he promised as a gift to LACMA in 2016, agreed with Gray that the gloaming light was lovely.

“If it were up to me the curtains wouldn’t be closed,” Goldstein said, noting that the curtains in his home — which is also made of concrete and glass — are never closed, and that the views from the Geffen Galleries are extraordinary and worth leaning into.

Koons said the building, and the moment in time that defines its unveiling, has the potential to bring the world together.

“It’s an amazing evening for all these people that love and believe in the value of art and humanity to be together and to celebrate architecture,” said Koons, noting that he looks forward to showing his art inside the new galleries. “LACMA is a place that’s here for future generations and Peter’s building is amazing.”

Will Ferrell and Viveca Paulin were among the major Hollywood stars at the gala.

(Gina Ferazzi / Los Angeles Times)

Chatter about the building could be heard in every cluster of guests. One group talked about how striking it was to see ancient Greek sculptures juxtaposed against the rush of traffic along Wilshire Boulevard; another discussed their hope for more landscaping, noting that the concrete ground and concrete building begged for some lush greenery.

Govan basked in the limelight nearby, shaking hands and doling out hugs and back pats. His vision for the building has been 20 years in the making, and he’s faced an enormous amount of pushback, but the structure is here and his enthusiasm for it has not waned.

“I’ve just always imagined people in the building — it’s for people,” Govan said. “And I want it to last 500 years, I want those little drill marks to accumulate, I want change. I want this to be something that generations will care for.”

Zumthor also seemed deeply pleased with the moment, saying, “I’ve always been happy,” and emphasized that working in L.A. taught him to embrace a certain frontier-like lack of refinement.

LACMA’s staff was elated, especially those who have been watching the project develop for decades and absorbing the large amounts of criticism that have accompanied its manifestation.

Stephanie Barron, LACMA’s senior curator and modern art department head, said, “This is the first night with our art world colleagues and donors, and it’s thrilling to see how they are responding, and how they are a little confused, at first, about where to go. Then they realize, that’s the point of this — and they are just going with the flow and they are smiling and happy and looking at the art. It’s a game changer.”

“I’ve been here nearly 20 years and seeing this going from concept to reality has been the greatest thing,” said Tiffany August, associate vice president of LACMA’s people and culture department, which oversees human resources. “So much soul and heart and effort went into this.”

Arun Mathai, budget officer and head of finance, has also been with the museum for 20 years and said it’s exciting to finally be on the other side of the project. “To see it happen in such a beautiful way is very gratifying. The notion of no hierarchy, of wandering around and seeing art from all over the world, from all time periods beautifully juxtaposed, it’s just so enlightening,” Mathai said.

Michael Govan, left, Peter Zumthor, Holly J. Mitchell and Mayor Karen Bass attend the opening gala.

(Gina Ferazzi / Los Angeles Times)

Later, during a four-course meal of broiled oysters, tuna tostadas, braised Wagyu short ribs and berry meringue, various LACMA supporters, including board co-chair Tony Ressler; life trustee and major donor Lynda Resnick; and L.A. County Supervisor Holly J. Mitchell, whose district houses LACMA, took to the stage in a tent set up west of the new building to sing the praises of the Geffen Galleries — and to note that the evening’s dinner raised a record-setting $11.5 million. (The Geffen Galleries’ ongoing fundraising campaign now stands at $869 million.)

“This is a great, great example of what can be achieved when government and philanthropy work hand in hand for the public good,” Ressler said before thanking Govan for “taking bold risks.” “Your legacy is now permanently etched in the stunning galleries that will open to the public very soon.”

Mitchell was full of praise for Govan and Zumthor.

“The Geffen Galleries didn’t come to fruition overnight. And frankly, nothing that changes the status quo ever does,” Mitchell said. “To Michael, Peter, David [Geffen] and our dear Elaine [Wynn], thank you for your patience, because visionaries like yourselves often have to wait for the rest of the world to catch up with you.”

Resnick got a big laugh when she described her first meeting with Govan and his wife 21 years ago.

“An exquisite couple walked into [vice chair of the board] Bobby Kotick’s house. There was Michael Govan, a true intellectual, Zen thinker, movie star handsome, and under consideration to run LACMA. By the end of the evening, I was sitting on his lap feeding him peeled grapes.”

She concluded on a more serious note, calling the Geffen Galleries a “masterpiece of public art.” “Only one person in the world could have done all this with the signature elegance and his provocative style,” she said of Govan. “Generations will cross that bridge and watch the cars stream below, and feel the power of being embraced by art above all the gorgeous chaos of our city.”

After a standing ovation, Govan introduced musicians Sean Watkins, Gabe Witcher and T Bone Burnett, who sang — quite fittingly — “The Times They Are A-Changin.’”