clubbing

AH, Ibiza. Those heady days of raving until dawn, no kids, and a lot of cocktails.

Take. Me. Back.

Well actually, two kids, slightly less dancing and a few less Espresso Martinis later, Tui might just have done it.

We’d tried once before, when our daughters were three and six, with less success, but with Lyla and Martha now 10 and 12, could we have finally hit the sweet spot?

Tui’s Holiday Village Seaview Ibiza is designed for kids, there’s no doubt about it.

With the busiest entertainment, sports and club programme I’ve ever come across, there’s literally about one hour in the day (after breakfast, before 10am) that they’re not catered for.

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Along with an onsite water park, three pools, snooker tables, an aerial walk, table tennis, arcades, paddle boarding and kayaking, there are also kids’ clubs, and stage, swimming and football academies.

There’s plenty of daytime fun and free games around the resort, too.

And all that is before an entire evening of child-friendly entertainment that begins as the pools close at 6pm.

In fact, it’s so busy, there’s a whole app devoted to the hotel, where you can book slots in advance for anything and everything your children could want to do on holiday.

As you squinted in the sunshine from your sunlounger (which, happily, the resort doesn’t let you reserve with your towel until after 8am) it was almost like watching a group of excitable Oompa Loompas rushing around Willy Wonka’s factory.

But instead of chocolate, they were squealing about the variety of fun they could have.

Although, it’s worth pointing out that as part of the all-inclusive, you can help yourself to free ice creams and afternoon cakes — so it pretty much is like Wonka’s factory.

Children zoomed around the resort, which is like a mini city — and because it felt so safe, my girls could dash between pools and the snack bar unaccompanied, while my husband David and I watched from the loungers.

We had to accompany the girls to the waterpark until we decided that as they were such good swimmers, and there were almost as many lifeguards as kids, we didn’t need to.

‘But what about the adults?’ I selfishly asked myself as we arrived, and I saw what the girls had in store.

Well, that’s exactly where Tui has played its trump card.

Favourite nights ever

Research conducted last year found that 60 per cent of parents miss their child-free clubbing days (like me) and regularly relive them with family kitchen discos (yes I do).

Inspired by this, Holiday Villages called on the youngest ever DJ duo — the brilliantly named Half Punk — to grace the island and give families enjoying their first summer holiday weekend a night to remember.

When I heard that the pair were 12 and 10, I wondered if they were actually going to DJ or just play at it.

But lo and behold. To mark 25 years since their namesakes Daft Punk released One More Time, the two properly mixed.

I’m not sure the hordes of children standing staring at the front fully embraced the old-school house music blaring out by the two helmeted youngsters — but the parents certainly did.

Eyes shut in ecstasy and arms were held aloft as confetti cannons blasted, glow sticks shimmered and the bass speakers reverberated around the resort.

You could instantly spot the old ravers who had allowed themselves to be taken back to those carefree days of thumping tunes and dancing like no one was watching.

And then after, a silent disco got all the youngsters involved again — wide-eyed at the adults belting out chart-toppers and throwing shapes like loons.

I’m not sure there’s anything better than properly dancing with your children on a dancefloor — and as we finally sank into our beds, we all decided it had been one of our favourite nights abroad ever.

And don’t think the fun stopped there. We also managed to get up the energy for a Neon Nights disco and an Ibiza Sunset dance while we were there.

The resort is right next to the beautiful sandy Port Des Torrent beach — with ­pedalos for hire and tavernas to relax in while watching the fabulous Ibiza sunsets.

We were lucky enough to get invited on a Meet The Sea boat trip, which aims to educate kids about the oceans.

Having sailed out to just off an uninhabited island, you snorkel with a marine specialist, who teaches you why the sea is nothing to be scared of.

He’ll even pick up sea anemones and cucumbers from the sea bed and let you hold them, while back on board the chef cooks paella. It’s a truly magical experience.

Plus, you’re just across the bay from San Antonio, so if you do feel the urge for nightclubs, you’re literally a bus ride away.

The hotel’s buffet restaurant was also ­perfect for the pickiest of eaters, with every kind of food a child could possibly ask for, and theme nights as well, so it didn’t get too samey.

You also get two free meals per week at the speciality restaurants, with Italian, American and grill options.

And as for the reps, I’m not sure I’ve ever seen anyone more smiley and enthusiastic, even as they did the dance routine to Bruno Mars’ APT for the 19th time that day.

Like Butlins on steroids, I knew Tui had hit its mark when our eldest daughter, without any word of a lie, turned to me and said: “This is better than the Maldives.”