jokes

An estimated 7 million Americans turned out Saturday to peacefully protest against the breakdown of our checks-and-balances democracy into a Trump-driven autocracy, rife with grift but light on civil rights.

Trump’s response? An AI video of himself wearing a crown inside a fighter plane, dumping what appears to be feces on these very protesters. In a later interview, he called participants of the “No Kings” events “whacked out” and “not representative of this country.”

I’m beginning to fear he’s right. What if the majority of Americans really do believe this sort of behavior by our president, or by anyone really, is acceptable? Even funny? A recent Economist/YouGov poll found that 81% of Republicans approve of the way Trump is handling his job. Seriously, the vast majority of Republicans are just fine with Trump’s policies and behavior.

According to MAGA, non-MAGA people are just too uptight these days.

Vice Troll JD Vance has become a relentless force for not just defending the most base and cruel of behaviors, but celebrating them. House Speaker Mike Johnson has made the spineless, limp justification of these behaviors an art form.

Between the two approaches to groveling to Trump’s ego and mendacity is everything you need to know about the future of the Republican Party. It will stop at nothing to debase and dehumanize any opposition — openly acknowledging that it dreams of burying in excrement even those who peacefully object.

Not even singer Kenny Loggins is safe. His “Top Gun” hit “Danger Zone” was used in the video. When he objected with a statement of unity, saying, “Too many people are trying to tear us apart, and we need to find new ways to come together. We’re all Americans, and we’re all patriotic. There is no ‘us and them’,” the White House responded with … a dismissive meme, clearly the new norm when responding to critics.

It may seem obvious, and even old news that this administration lacks accountability. But the use of memes and AI videos as communication, devoid of truth or consequence, adds a new level of danger to the disconnect.

These non-replies not only remove reality from the equation, but remove the need for an actual response — creating a ruling class that does not feel any obligation to explain or defend its actions to the ruled.

Politico published a story last week detailing the racist, misogynistic and hate-filled back-and-forth of an official, party-sanctioned “young Republican” group. Since most of our current politicians are part of the gerontocracy, that young is relative — these are adults, in their 20s and 30s — and they are considered the next generation of party leaders, in a party that has already skewed so far right that it defends secret police.

Here’s a sample.

Bobby Walker, the former vice chair of the New York State Young Republicans, called rape “epic,” according to Politico.

Another member of the chat called Black Americans “watermelon people.”

“Great. I love Hitler,” wrote another when told delegates would vote for the most far-right candidate.

There was also gas chamber “humor” in there and one straight up, “I’m ready to watch people burn now,” from a woman in the conversation, Anne KayKaty, New York’s Young Republican’s national committee member, according to the Hill.

Group members engaged in slurs against South Asians, another popular target of the far right these days. There’s an entire vein of racism devoted to the idea that Indians smell bad, in case you were unaware.

Speaking of a woman mistakenly believed to be South Asian, one group member — Vermont state Sen. Samuel Douglass, wrote: “She just didn’t bathe often.”

While some in the Republican party have denounced, albeit half-heartedly, the comments, others, including Vance, have gone on the attack. Vance, whose wife is Indian, claims everyone is making a big deal out of nothing.

“But the reality is that kids do stupid things. Especially young boys, they tell edgy, offensive jokes. Like, that’s what kids do,” Vance said. “And I really don’t want us to grow up in a country where a kid telling a stupid joke — telling a very offensive, stupid joke — is cause to ruin their lives.”

Not to be outdone, Johnson responded to the poop jet video by somehow insinuating there is an elevated meaning to it.

“The president was using social media to make a point,” Johnson said, calling it “satire.”

Satire is meant to embarrass and humiliate, to call out through humor the indefensible. I’ll buy the first part of that. Trump meant to embarrass and humiliate. But protesting, of course, is anything but indefensible and the use of feces as a weapon is a way of degrading those “No Kings” participants so that Trump doesn’t have to answer to their anger — no different than degrading Black people and women in that group chat.

Those 7 million Americans who demonstrated on Saturday simply do not matter to Trump, or to Republicans. Not their healthcare, not their ability to pay the bills, not their worry that a country they love is turning in to one where their leader literally illustrates that he can defecate on them.

But not everyone can be king.

While the young Republicans believe they shared in their leader’s immunity, it turns out they don’t. That Vermont state senator? He resigned after the Republican governor put on pressure.

Maybe 7 million Americans angry at Trump can’t convince him to change his ways, but enough outraged Vermont voters can make change in their corner of the country.

Which is why the one thing Trump does fear is the midterms, when voters get to shape our own little corners of America — and by extension, whether Trump gets to keep using his throne.

Lorraine Kelly strips off as part of ground-breaking Change + Check campaign raising awareness of breast cancer

TV star Lorraine Kelly has stripped off Calendar Girls-style for the first time – with only a pair of strategically-placed buns covering her modesty. Speaking to the Mirror about her first topless shoot, she joked how she worried her team would be “traumatised” by the sight of her bare flesh.

The shoot was all in aid of the show’s National Check Your Boobs Day initiative within its Lorraine’s Change + Check campaign. Lorraine admits: “I just loved this idea. It’s cheeky and funny and is a nod to the wonderful Calendar Girls.

“It also gave me the chance to say the iconic line “we’re going to need considerably bigger buns”.

READ MORE: Vicious backlash before massive change to Strictly Come Dancing voting rule

Opening up about stripping off, Lorraine adds: “I didn’t feel in any way vulnerable or uncomfortable as I was with my team who are my friends, and our amazing photographer had also gone through breast cancer herself. My editor Victoria asked if I was comfortable being filmed and I told her I was fine, but to check with the crew in case they would be traumatised!!

“It was all very light-hearted, and after all it’s all about getting the Change + Check message across.” The photograph was taken by photographer Sally Mais, a survivor of breast cancer.

The new day will take place today which show bosses hope will serve as a crucial reminder for everyone to make self-checking a regular monthly habit. Lorraine is even after an official endorsement from Prime Minister Keir Starmer to establish the day on the national calendar. It comes as the The Change + Check campaign is now officially endorsed by the NHS.

Minister for Public Health and Prevention, Ashley Dalton said: “It’s so incredibly important to check for the signs of breast cancer because we know early diagnosis leads to better outcomes. The Change + Check campaign is a brilliant way for people out and about shopping on their local high street to quickly check themselves as they get changed, knowing the advice is accurate and officially supporting the NHS.”

Asda will also be selling specially created Change + Check ‘iced busty buns’ in their stores throughout the month of October, and the Change + Check sticker will now be visible in Boots pharmacies across the country. Lorraine says the campaign is one of the things she is most proud of in her 40 year career. She said: “Every year the campaign just gets bigger and bigger, and I am so proud of the work we’ve done and the lives we’ve helped to save.

“Launching Britain’s first ever ‘National Check Your Boobs Day’ is a huge step forward and will hopefully be a crucial reminder for everyone to prioritise their breast health. This is something that truly matters to me, and I’m so grateful for all the support we receive from the public and our partners to get this vital message out there.”

Founded by Lorraine producer Helen Addis MBE and host Lorraine Kelly CBE in 2019, the campaign aims to destigmatise conversations around breast cancer. Over the past seven years, more than 100 women and one man have contacted the show to report that they have received a breast cancer diagnosis as a result of seeing the campaign.

Join The Mirror’s WhatsApp Community or follow us on Google News , Flipboard , Apple News, TikTok , Snapchat , Instagram , Twitter , Facebook , YouTube and Threads – or visit The Mirror homepage.

Some inside jokes can be funny. Others not so much.

John Mateer seems to have fallen into the second category: The Oklahoma Sooners quarterback is now on defense regarding NCAA policy about student-athletes and sports betting.

Screenshots of Venmo transactions the QB made in 2022 began circulating Monday on social media. They appear to show that Mateer, then a Washington State freshman, wrote “sports gambling” to describe two separate payments to the same individual. The amounts were undisclosed.

One of those descriptions included in “UCLA vs USC” in parentheses. The Trojans defeated the Bruins 48-45 on Nov. 19, 2022, the day before both Venmo payments were allegedly made.

Current NCAA rules prohibit student-athletes from engaging in sports betting at any level, although a proposal is being considered that would permit gambling on professional sports only.

Mateer released a statement Tuesday indicating that he had written those words in jest.

“The allegations that I once participated in sports gambling are false,” he wrote on X (formerly Twitter). “My previous Venmo descriptions did not accurately portray the transactions in question but were instead inside jokes between me and my friends.

“I have never bet on sports. I understand the seriousness of the matter but recognize that, taken out of context, those Venmo descriptions suggest otherwise. I can assure my teammates, coaches, and officials at the NCAA that I have not engaged in any sports gambling.”

Oklahoma Athletics said in a statement that its student-athletes receive ongoing education on matters related to sports gambling and that it uses a service that provides comprehensive monitoring of sports gambling activities.

“OU takes any allegations of gambling seriously and works closely with the NCAA in any situations of concern,” the department said. “OU Athletics is unaware of any NCAA investigation and has no reason to believe there is one pending.”

Mateer played three seasons at Washington State, including the past two as the Cougars’ starting quarterback, before transferring to Oklahoma this offseason.

Israeli TV personalities are making fun of children dying of starvation in Gaza, with one even claiming a mother ate her baby. It is part of a right-wing media campaign that is promoting the famine as a hoax.

Alex Caruso is an NBA champion!

Of course, Caruso already had a ring before he and the Oklahoma City Thunder closed out the Indiana Pacers in Game 7 of the NBA Finals on Sunday night. His first one came with the Lakers after the slightly shortened 2020 season and a postseason played entirely in the NBA bubble in Orlando during the COVID-19 pandemic.

“Now I got a real one,” Caruso told reporters following the Thunder’s 103-91 victory over the Pacers. “Now nobody can say anything.”

He was joking, of course, making reference to the trolls who try to diminish the Lakers’ title from five years ago because of the unique circumstances under which it was won.

That Lakers team had an average age of nearly 29 and was led by LeBron James, who was 35 years old upon winning his fourth NBA championship.

This Thunder team is led by league MVP Shai Gilgeous-Alexander, who is 26 and — like the rest of his Oklahoma City teammates, except for Caruso — hadn’t won an NBA title until now. Their average age is 25.68 years, making them the youngest NBA champion team since the 1977 Portland Trail Blazers.

“I think just because of the way the team is constructed now versus the team I had in 2020, it was much harder with this team just because of the experience [level],” Caruso, 31, said. “… I think through the playoffs, this team grew up and learned on the fly. Most teams have to learn through losses and learn though defeat, and I think this team learned through success. And it’s a unique capability to be able to do that for 21- to 27-year-old kids.

“For me, I’ve seen greats do it, so I knew the way, I knew the mindset. But to see these guys do it, man, it’s really cool to see it in person, and I’m so happy for the guys just to be able to figure it out and be able to get this done.”

Caruso was a valuable player off the bench en route to both of his NBA championships, averaging 6.5 points per game in 2020 and 9.2 this season. He scored 20 points in three different games during the 2025 season, including twice during the Finals; his high score during the 2020 campaign was 16 points.

He signed with the Chicago Bulls as a free agent during the 2021 offseason and was traded to Oklahoma City for guard Josh Giddey last summer. Caruso’s previous championship experience was also valuable after Sunday’s game, when Caruso had to give his teammates a crash course on popping champagne to celebrate the victory.

“We didn’t do it all at the same time until like the third try,” Caruso said of popping the corks. “I tried my best when we got in there, I was like, ‘All right, let’s get a head count, let’s make sure everyone’s here before we do the first one.’ And through the learning experience of taking the foil off, undoing the metal and having the cork ready, there was like three or four guys that popped their corks. And then it happened again. …

“We went through the process a couple times and eventually we got everybody on the same page. But, yeah, it was a good first try. We’ll get some rest, reset, try to go again next year and see if we can do it again, and we’ll be better.”