Feltz

Vanessa Feltz has addressed some of her struggles in the early 2000s and argued that while people were very excited by the introduction of reality TV, vetting is now too ‘sketchy’

Vanessa Feltz has called for an end to “sordid” reality TV shows which she said gave her some of her lowest moments in her career.

The broadcaster, 64, shared her thoughts on how the format has changed over the past two decades, while reflecting on some incidents involving reality stars. According to Vanessa, vetting processes on some shows were “sketchy at best.”

In an article for You, the journalist said reality shows often recruit “individuals desperate for exposure” from social media – with women often asked whether they are looking for love, and men asked whether they are hoping to have some fun. Describing the reality genre as “sordid,” Vanessa said things have significantly changed since the early 2000s.

At the time, the idea of having “real people, doing real things, in real time” on TV seemed “revolutionary”, she argued, as demonstrated by the success of Big Brother. “We wanted ‘ordinary’ people scratching their armpits, pairing socks, quarrelling, vying, lying, picking their toenails and getting their rocks off,” Vanessa, who famously broke down and told Big Brother to “f*** off” during the first-ever Celebrity Big Brother in 2001, wrote.

Back then, mental health wasn’t given the same importance it has now, Vanessa said, meaning that many people – including herself – didn’t realise that reality TV posed any risk to participants. But she wrote: “When I said I’d had enough and please could I pack my case and go – we weren’t being paid, we were doing it free for Comic Relief – Big Brother replied: ‘If you leave, Vanessa, you’ll be the most hated woman in Britain.'”

She said that after being evicted, she “shook uncontrollably” and was “disorientated, trembling” until she was able to reunite with her daughters, which made her “remember how it felt to be myself.” She said: “A quarter of a century later people still ask, what the beep happened? I tell them, when you are on a reality TV show it isn’t a game.

Opening up on her experience of filming Celebrity Fit Club in 2004, Vanessa said she was “so scared” of letting her team down that she “stopped all food and water on Friday mornings” and after the weigh-in on Saturday afternoon, contestants “were all shaky and faint with hunger.”

She said that after drinking a glass of water and eating a couple of Ryvita crackers, they would go back on the scales and find they had already gained back the weight presenter Dale Winton had announced they had lost. “It was hell,” Vanessa reflected.

Giving the example of reality star Sinitta, who appeared on her Channel 5 show Vanessa on June 1 and said she needed therapy after I’m A Celebrity…South Africa due to the amount of trolling she faced, the broadcaster said reality TV is capably of leaving people damaged.

Vanessa’s reflection comes after her Channel 5 daytime chat show was cancelled only a year after its debut. According to reports, the presenter was blindsided and left furious by the news. The chat show sees Vanessa talk to guests and people at home who had called in to share their experiences of whichever topic was on the agenda.

But this week, a 5 spokesperson confirmed to the Mirror that the show would be coming off air, saying: “Due to afternoon scheduling changes, ‘Vanessa’ will be rested from July 17th. We thank Vanessa and her team at ITN for 18 months of warm, witty, wise and searingly honest shows. Vanessa remains a valued member of the 5 family and we are discussing future projects together.”

Following the cancellation, a source told the Mail that Vanessa was blindsided when she was told that the show had been axed. They said: “Vanessa was brought into a meeting after her show came off air this week. She had no idea what the meeting was about and certainly didn’t expect to be told it was not being renewed. She feels so blindsided but also let down by bosses.”

The cancellation is thought to be linked to low ratings for the programme, as well as an inability to get the scam callers under control. The source said that producers “tried their best to crack down” on the pranks, but it couldn’t be done.

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HE is the nineties pop star who finally found his happily ever after.

But for Phats & Small singer Ben Ofoedu, the road to marital bliss was paved with a painful history of what he now describes as mental abuse and emasculation by former partner Vanessa Feltz. Something which friends of the Channel 5 presenter vehemently deny.

A year on from his lavish £100,000 Cumbrian wedding to aesthetics entrepreneur Vanessa Brown – affectionately dubbed Vanessa 2.0 by the man himself – the 53-year-old musician is practically glowing.

He is happier, healthier, and four stone lighter. But behind his beaming smile and the tales of his idyllic new life, there lies a darker, turbulent history that he is only just now ready to reveal to the world.

In a searingly honest new interview with The Sun, Ben has opened up about the toxic reality of his 17-year relationship with television and radio veteran Vanessa Feltz, making explosive allegations about the profound psychological toll of their high-profile romance.

While the collapse of his engagement to the Channel 5 presenter in 2023 was highly publicised following his admitted infidelity, Ben claims the public has only ever heard half the story. Now, after intense therapy and finding true love, he is shedding light on what really went on behind closed doors.

Through his recent charitable endeavours with his new bride, the singer has found himself reflecting heavily on his own past.

“We do a lot of charity stuff for victims of abuse, and you come across a lot of men in these situations,” Ben explains.

“Men who’ve been mentally abused, not so much physically. People think abuse means physical, but you can be abused mentally.

“Everything from emasculation to being told you’re not good enough. It’s like a self-fulfilling prophecy.”

When asked if this observation stems from his own personal experience with his famous ex-fiancée, Ben doesn’t flinch.

“Yeah, oh yeah, without a doubt,” he states firmly. “Emasculation, people referring to you as not being able to read, down-talking you, a constant barrage of insults. People don’t have to look too far to see where it came from.”

The trauma, he reveals, is deep-seated, creeping up on him over the course of almost two decades.

He recalls: “When I was out of it. When you’re in it, it’s so subtle, so gradual that you don’t quite see it happening, you don’t quite know. You question everything and ask, ‘Why did that happen? Why did I feel like that?’ When someone professional starts going through it with you, you can see the patterns and stuff like that. Yeah, I had therapy after that.”

Today, Ben refuses to even utter his ex’s name, a stark indicator of the deep freeze between the former couple.

“There is only one Vanessa,” he declares, referring lovingly to his new bride. “I don’t know that other lady. And I definitely don’t know her from the comments she’s said. I don’t know that lady anymore.”

He confirms that he has no contact with the 64-year-old broadcaster, nor does he have any desire to ever cross paths with her again.

He insists: “No, not at all, and I really wouldn’t want to. I’ve got nothing to do with her, I want nothing to do with her. People are in your life for a season, a reason, or a lifetime, and she was there for a season. It was a long season, but it was maybe a bit too long.”

The fallout from the split undeniably damaged his public reputation, painting him squarely as the villain of the piece.

But Ben is deeply critical of how his former flame handled the break-up.

“The truth is, I’m kind of a musician, and that’s kind of what it is, it’s only tied to her until something else happens and there’s a new story being written, it’s the past really, that’s what that is.

“I’ve not really much to say for her. I think she was completely classless the way she dealt with things, it’s not my sort of person, I don’t know her anymore, I don’t recognise her.”

Addressing the fallout and the damage to his reputation, Ben remains philosophical.

“Yes, completely. The great thing that happened was I got to know who my friends were,” he admits.

“I understand the general public doesn’t know me personally, but my wedding was a great testimony of the people who know me and the friends that I had, the people who really knew me. You reap what you sow; that’s all I can say. You reap what you sow. It doesn’t take a genius to see what’s going on.”

When pressed on the cheating scandal that ultimately torpedoed the relationship, Ben is defensive, taking a swipe at how his ex monetised the pain.

“Now about the infidelity, I never said that it was the way to do things,” he explains.

“For Vanessa, that was her story, and she used it and monetised it, and when it’s not working for her, she moved on to something else. I wouldn’t monetise a real relationship that had real problems. I think to tell the media that it’s over before you tell the person is not… I don’t know many situations that do that.”

When asked if his new wife worries about his history of being unfaithful, Ben is quick to shut down the narrative that he is a serial cheat.

He told me: “I don’t know if doing it once is a history, I don’t know if that constitutes a history of it. She made me look worse than I was, and it garnered a lot more attention. I don’t know if once is a history, that’s what I will say about that. There’s never been any conversation about that at all.”

He also casts doubt on whether his previous 16-year engagement was ever destined for the altar at all, bluntly suggesting the intention to actually tie the knot was not there “from the other side”.

He also has a brutal theory as to why his ex has failed to find lasting romance since their bitter split.

“I mean, I don’t know if I would want to be with a lady who’d want to discuss every single detail of their private life,” he said.

“I think how men saw me come out of that situation, they think, ‘No thanks, not for me’.”

But Ben is finally ready to reclaim his narrative. He is currently putting the finishing touches on his own autobiography, playfully titled Turnaround: Memoirs of an Ageing Boy Bander, which he hopes will hit the shelves this December.

“I’ve been writing it. I was going to put it out last year, but there were a few parts I missed out when I read through; I need to give the full context. Everything’s in the book; it’s about turnaround moments in my life, good and bad. That period of my life.”

“But it’s nice for people to see the actual context and how we got together and what happened behind closed doors, you’ve only heard her side of the story,” he adds, taking a thinly veiled swipe at his ex’s memoirs.

“I didn’t respond to anything she said in her book, and obviously it didn’t do very well, that’s the thing. I’m not doing it for that. I talk about my musical journey, it brings me up to the current day, and what a happy relationship can be like.”

He confirms no lawyers have had to get involved with his manuscript: “No, I won’t mention her name. She cleverly didn’t mention mine, she called me OHW [One Hit Wonder], but people will know.”

Asked if the book will definitely hit shelves this year, he says: “Aiming for December, but I don’t know. It’s not quite finished, I need to type two more chapters, making sure everything is real and really happened, making sure. We’re hoping for December, that’s what we’re pushing towards.”

The contrast between his turbulent past and his blissful present truly couldn’t be starker. Ben is buzzing with energy as he discusses his 30-year-old wife, Vanessa Brown.

The couple, who married after a whirlwind romance, are utterly inseparable.

“I found myself again, I am buzzing,” he says. “Every day is happy, we got together, and within six months we were married, when you know you know.”

He has strong advice for others when it comes to love, formed by the fire of his past mistakes.

“These long drawn-out engagements, unless you’ve got a couple of kids and are waiting to afford the wedding, I think they’re pointless,” he says.

“You’re engaged to be married, not to be engaged. I don’t think that works, and that’s just from experience. If you meet someone, within six months, you pretty much know whether you’ll get married or not. Don’t carry on the relationship more than six months if you’re not sure you want to spend the rest of your life with that person.”

He also revealed that the couple are actively trying for a baby.

“Hopefully, by the end of the year, that’s what we’re trying to do. If Vanessa fell pregnant late this year, that would be amazing news; that’s why we’re travelling and doing all the things couples do before they have kids.

“We want as many as God provides. I come from a big family, and I know what it’s like to have brothers and sisters. I always loved that growing up.”

For Ben Ofoedu, the dark days of his past are now firmly in the rearview mirror.

He insists that with Vanessa 2.0 by his side, a tell-all book on the way, and exciting baby plans for the couple, his life is now complete.

Representatives for Vanessa Feltz were contacted for comment.