cold open

As we mentioned last time when Sabrina Carpenter hosted “Saturday Night Live,” there’s no substitute for a host who fully throws themselves into “SNL.”

He may not have done double duty as host and musical guest the way Carpenter did, but Miles Teller appeared to fully embrace the challenge of returning to host for a second time (the first was in 2022). The “Top Gun 2: Maverick” star, who’ll next be appearing in the movie “Eternity,” gave a solid performance, appearing in nearly every sketch, including the cold open and two pre-recorded videos.

He first appeared as former Gov. Andrew Cuomo, a candidate for New York mayor, in the cold open with help from Ramy Youssef and Shane Gillis as opponents Zohran Mamdani and Curtis Sliwa.

After that, Teller played a hungover game show contestant recovering from Halloween, a hockey player shooting a public service announcement for the unfortunately named Nashville Predators and both twin Property Brothers in a video sketch about the current White House renovation.

Teller was also in a sketch about a TV newsroom that decides to show viewers what its background employees are doing, a Netflix promo for a true crime story about husbands who don’t know where their wives went, one about a police press conference that takes a turn and a show closer about a silly Italian restaurant in Nebraska.

Teller handled it all well; he’s good with accents and earned strong laughs, especially playing two characters at the same time in the “Property Brothers” sketch and as Cuomo in the cold open.

Musical guest Brandi Carlile performed “Church & State” and “Human.”

This week’s cold open was one of the stronger (or at least funnier) political sketches of the season so far, tackling the New York mayoral race. As hosted by Errol Louis (Kenan Thompson), “the least famous person to be impersonated on ‘SNL,’ ” the debate sketch portrayed Cuomo (Teller) as a sexually harassing (“Yadda yadda yadda, honk honk, squeeze squeeze) panderer to Jewish voters; Mamdani (Youssef) as a force-smiling, TikTok-flirting candidate who’s pretty sure he won’t be able to implement his promises; and long-shot candidate Sliwa (Gillis) as an “old-fashioned New York nut” with one traumatic story after another to recount. The biggest surprise may have been Gillis, who as Sliwa recounted stories about being hung by his testicles and getting assaulted by a Times Square Spider-Man. Where was this energy when Gillis hosted “SNL”? As has been the habit on many a cold open, President Trump (James Austin Johnson) interrupts the proceedings to mock the candidates and insert his own commentary. This time, that included singing a song from “Phantom of the Opera” to conclude the sketch.

Teller’s monologue was short and simple, relaying how as a kid who moved around most of his childhood, “SNL” was a constant. He shared a photo of himself and his sisters dressed up as the “Night at the Roxbury” characters from the show and then made up a list of memories from the show, like having his first beer in the audience and falling over after having a few beers. Teller mentioned that he and his wife lost their Palisades home in January’s Los Angeles fires. As such, he made sure to point out the fire exits for the audience.

Best sketch of the night: An extreme White House makeover

The Property Brothers Jonathan and Drew Scott (Teller times two) meet their toughest clients yet: Trump and First Lady Melania Trump (Chloe Fineman) who need help with their current renovation of the White House to make room for a new ballroom. Melania shared her skeleton and withered tree decorations (“They are for Christmas,” she said), and the couple complained that 55,000 square feet and 132 rooms just isn’t enough space. With a budget of “$350 million to infinity” the brothers get to work with the help of park rangers and astronauts working through the government shutdown. But when it comes to getting paid for their work, there’s a problem. “Aren’t you guys from Canada?” the president asks. Then he calls ICE on them.

Also good: Nobody asked for this much transparency in news

On a show called Newspoint, the host (Fineman) and her guest (Thompson) are trying to have a serious news discussion, but because the show has opened up its full newsroom to viewers, all the workers in the background draw attention. Among them are Mikey Day, who awkwardly notices the cameras are on him before spilling a carrier of drinks, Bowen Yang as a worker who gets electrocuted by a copy machine and Teller, who has manga erotica up on his work screen. It’s nice to see some physical comedy from Day in particular and the sketch’s visual gags work nicely.

‘Weekend Update’ winner: George Santos is back, untruthful as ever!

Andrew Dismukes and Ashley Padilla (who should be a full cast member at this point instead of a featured player) played a couple who just made out but are trying to discuss the government shutdown. But it was Yang as chronic liar George Santos who stole “Update” (and some jewels) after Yang missed an opportunity on the last “SNL” episode to play the former representative, whose prison term was commuted by Trump. Santos claimed he finished the New York marathon, which hadn’t happened yet, and kept interrupting his chat with “Update” co-host Colin Jost to take calls with prisoners with a jail window and phone he brought with him. He purported to speak with Ghislaine Maxwell, Luigi Mangione and Sean “Diddy” Combs before revealing that the key to making prison rice pudding is preheating the toilet to 350 degrees. Santos ended the segment by revealing the necklace he stole from the Louvre and insisting that he’d just won the World Series.

After last week’s worrisome Season 51 debut with Bad Bunny, it seemed like a 50/50 chance on whether the second episode of the season with guest host and beloved “Saturday Night Live” alum Amy Poehler would turn things around. Would the writing feel sharper and less obvious in the hands of a veteran sketch performer?

Poehler, host of the popular podcast “Good Hang,” made all the right moves and may have even overextended herself, appearing in almost every sketch, including the cold open and “Weekend Update” for a joke-off. You could (and should) give Poehler lots of credit for her boundless energy, which lifted weaker sketches, like one about a menopausal mom who goes goth and one where Poehler and Bowen Yang are the composers of the “Severance” opening theme (the joke is that their theme songs always start with a “Fresh Prince of Bel-Air”-like rap as their first draft).

But Poehler also benefited from much stronger sketch premises compared to last week’s, from a beautifully performed sketch about a TV psychic, Miss Lycus, who rushes everyone because she has a hard out at 7 p.m., to a spot-on parody of Netflix’s “The Hunting Wives,” with a guest appearance from Poehler’s “Parks & Recreation” co-star Aubrey Plaza. The writing afforded Poehler with big, broad characters, like a CEO giving birth during a meeting with her employees, the matriarch in a family of jerks called The Rudemans and an elderly lawyer who interrupts a TV commercial to one-up other lawyers on the basis of having the most experience.

Poehler also got a little help from some long-time friends and alums, including Tina Fey, appearing as Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem in the cold open, and Seth Meyers, returning to the “Weekend Update” desk with Poehler and Fey.

Maybe podcasting has allowed Poehler to store some stage energy to burst-fire on “SNL”; she put in a great performance for a solid episode overall.

Musical guests Role Model performed “Sally, When The Wine Runs Out,” with a surprise appearance from Charli XCX as Sally, and “Some Protector.” Before the close, “SNL” memorialized Diane Keaton, whose death was announced Saturday, in a title card. She never hosted “Saturday Night Live” but was portrayed on the show multiple times.

The cold open this week parodied Atty. Gen. Pam Bondi’s contentious meeting this week with the U.S. Senate Judiciary Committee. Poehler appeared as Bondi and responded to questions from Democratic senators with a series of withering insults she described as “roast-style burns I have on this piece of paper.” After mocking them and avoiding questions about the indictment of James Comey and the Jeffrey Epstein files, Bondi makes way for Noem (Fey, returning to “SNL” cold open politics), who joins in the mocking, telling one senator, “That makes me laugh more than the end of ‘Old Yeller.’ ” After being reminded that a dog gets shot at the end of that film, she responds, “Dogs don’t just get shot. Heroes shoot them.” While the first half of the cold open was shaky, with insults that weren’t landing despite Poehler’s forceful delivery, Fey’s appearance livened things up and ended strong with a call-and-response between Fey and Poehler that made fun of ICE recruitment ads. “Do you take supplements that you bought at a gas station?” Noem asked, “buckle up and slap on some Oakleys, big boy, and welcome to ICE!”

Poehler’s monologue was sweet, wistful and self-deprecating. “I found my first love here,” she said, “being famous.” She went on to describe her life now, saying, “I am a podcaster. If that’s not a recession indicator, I don’t know what is.” She also pointed out that this episode marked the actual 50-year anniversary of “SNL,” which first aired on Oct. 11, 1975. “Just like (host) George Carlin, I am extremely high,” she said. Poehler poked fun at AI actors who’ve been in the news and might want to take her job. “You’ll never be able to write a joke, and I am willing to do full frontal, but nobody’s asked me, OK?” she concluded defiantly.

Best sketch of the night: The thigh squeezes are bigger in Texas, too

It may be a little late to the party (the show came out in July), but this mock trailer for Netflix’s “The Hunting Wives” hits all the right notes with Poehler as frequently topless Margo and Chloe Fineman as Sophie (Malin Ackerman and Brittany Snow, respectively, on the series). The trailer promises that as the women get hornier and drunker, thighs will be squeezed and guns will be drawn. Aubrey Plaza appears as a new wife from California and soon she’s being caressed by all the other women in the cast as they make mimosas. A few great lines from this one: “It’s like ‘Call Me By Your Name’ for women who shop at Bass Pro Shop,” and “Don’t watch it on a plane.”

Also good: Don’t settle for just 100 years of legal experience

Pohler’s character in the Psychic Talk Show sketch was very funny, but the sketch about one-upping lawyers edges it out only because it goes to some extremely weird and dumb places for much longer than needed and incorporates what looked like the entire cast. What starts as a basic personal injury lawyer commercial explaining how the firm has 50 years of combined experience ends up including long-living turtles, Sarah Sherman as a vampire attorney named Dracu-Law, and an ageless tree, Yggdrasil (Yang), who once represented Zeus.

‘Weekend Update’ winner: Someday, that 13-pound baby is going to watch this

On a packed “Weekend Update,” Sherman debuted over-caffeinated Long Islander Rhonda LaCenzo, who rails against New York City mayoral candidate Zohran Mamdani. And Marcello Hernández and Jane Wickline returned as a seemingly mismatched couple discussing their Halloween plans. But it was an epic joke-off featuring past “Update” anchors Poehler, Fey and Meyers facing off against current ones Colin Jost and Michael Che to make fun of the birth of a nearly 13-pound baby born in Tennessee. “It was so big that he slapped the doctor on his ass!” Poehler began. Some of the better jokes: “The woman zipped around the room like a deflated balloon.” “Did she give birth or did it drive out?” “The baby’s name is AHHHHH!” Poehler rounded out the contest by declaring, “The record was for loosest vagina and the previous held… by me!”