ARCADES, ice cream parlours, chippies and tourist attractions galore – there’s one town that has everything you’d look for in a seaside trip, but the catch is, it’s not on the coast.
Matlock Bath in the Derbyshire Dales has attracted visitors for centuries and is renowned for its coastal feel, even though it’s miles from the sea.
It may not have a beach, but the banks of the River Derwent are a great alternative for being beside the water.
And there are so many chippies on one half-mile stretch between the Fishpond Inn and the Midland pub, that I think this little gem could easily give Scarborough a run for its money to claim the title of the chip shop capital of the country.
The Yorkshire resort has 93 takeaways, which equals 85.4 for every 100,000 people, while I counted 10 along Matlock Bath’s North and South Parade.
With a population of just 670, that means there’s one chippie per 67 residents.
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All these fish bars are needed, though, to feed the hungry hordes that flock to the area, especially in warm weather.
It’s a mecca for motorcyclists, as well as offering family-friendly attractions like theme park Gulliver’s Kingdom and the Heights of Abraham.
The town also boasts the oldest pleasure park in the UK, which has been wooing wanderers for almost 300 years.
I took a meander around Lovers’ Walk, which is accessed via a bridge over the river, and felt like I’d happened upon a wilderness, miles away from civilisation.
You climb up the steep wooded slopes to the edge of the treeline to get incredible views out over the rolling countryside.
Further along, you can spot the rides and attractions over at Gulliver’s Kingdom on the opposite side of the valley.
It’s no wonder that visitors have been strolling here since at least 1742 and why it was a favourite for courting couples seeking privacy from prying eyes, hence the name.
I’ve been visiting this area since I was little and never been up to this secluded spot, so it just goes to show how much there is on offer, as every time I come, I find something new to do.
If you’re visiting without kids, I would thoroughly recommend taking a swim at the lido at the New Bath Hotel, which is fed by a natural geothermal spring that has a temperature of around 20C.
The pool is for over-18s only and costs £10 for a 50-minute swim if you’re not a guest at the hotel.
For families, you really can’t go wrong with a trip on the cable cars up to the Heights of Abraham, where you can explore the caverns through the cliffs and enjoy the playgrounds and walks with views out over the town and river below.
Blue Peter badge holders can get in free and it’s a fantastic day out, unlike anywhere else I’ve visited at home or abroad.
You’d be mad to miss this unique place if you’re in the area, as it really does have something to appeal to all ages, including a display paying homage to the Wombles this summer.
Even Queen Victoria gave it her seal of approval when she came here and trekked up to the vantage point on a donkey – I’m sure she would have given the alpine cable cars installed in 1984 her royal assent as the perfect way to make the ascent if they had been around at the time.
If you’re looking for a bit of a break, you should check out the accommodation on offer at Gulliver’s Kingdom, which is great for a day out or an overnight stay.
It’s got plenty of rides that are perfect for primary aged children and lots of its rooms are themed around Wind in the Willows, as well as some for little princesses and wannabe wizards.
It’s even got an indoor glamping option, with bell tents set up in one big room that also houses a camp kitchen.
One of my favourite days out in Matlock Bath was bringing my youngest son to see the illuminations, which take place on weekends in early autumn.
This is certainly a spectacle to behold, with themed boats lit up in the darkness as they parade up and down the Derwent.
Some evenings also have fireworks and there’s entertainment and fairground rides on the riverside.
The boat parade makes perfect use of its setting and you can see why it’s still going strong after more than a century.
If you love discovering quirky spots with something different around every corner, you could do a lot worse than heading to the Derbyshire Dales and checking out Britain’s only inland seaside town.