virginity

GLIDING into the glitzy Grand Atrium and gazing up at three marble-clad floors of bars and boutiques, a thought hit me.

If this is just one small section of the impressive ship Iona, how am I going to experience everything on offer in just one-and-a-half days?

This was my first cruise and, as a total novice, I’d decided to book a short, two-night sailing.

P&O Cruises’ Iona is deemed the perfect ship for first-time British cruisers, partly because — carrying 5,200 guests and 1,800 crew, it is big enough to not feel cramped or overwhelming.

Plus there are plenty of familiar UK favourites on board from roast dinners to Tetley tea.

And with prices starting at £199 per person, including all your food and activities, you can’t go wrong.

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Longer voyages are cracking value, too, with five nights on a European itinerary costing less than £500pp.

You could spend a week on board and not run out of things to do thanks to Iona’s 30 bars and restaurants, ten entertainment venues — including a cinema, theatre and spa — swimming pools and hot tubs along the decks.

I stayed in a Conservatory Suite, where floor-to-ceiling windows offered breathtaking views without having to brave the biting wind on the balcony — the only downside of a UK cruise.

Luckily, the SkyDome has a heated indoor pool and this area of the boat has just had a sleek refit.

It’s a great place to kick back with a beer in hand (a pint of Moretti costs £6.25).

Nowhere is quite as relaxing as the spa, though — home to a therapeutic sauna, sensory steam room and rejuvenating hydrotherapy pool.

If that doesn’t float your boat, why not indulge in some retail therapy at the on-board boutiques, where you’ll find designer watches, bags and sunglasses, among other gems.

A particular hit with my husband was the Barbour shop — I’m fairly certain he came home with a whole new wardrobe.

When we weren’t watching aerial acrobatics in the large theatre, or rolling dice at the casino, we were sampling the excellent food.

‘BUFFET OF DREAMS’

The Horizon Restaurant — an all-you-can eat buffet of dreams — has salads and sandwiches, freshly-cut kebabs and full roast dinners.

Meanwhile, The Quays offers a street food style selection of live cooking stations, where I tucked into delicious breakfasts of fresh scrambled eggs and hash browns.

And Ripples ice cream parlour serves treats with edible cups and spoons — a small but fabulous nod to P&O cutting back on waste.

It would be hard to tire of the dining options included in your fare, but if you do fancy treating yourself, the speciality joints are top notch.

We loved Sindhu, the Indian restaurant where you can get three courses for £22, with a £3 supplement for the lobster thermidor.

My husband and I enjoyed Sindhu’s signature cocktail, the East India punch, a muddle of spiced rum, cognac, falernum (a sweet syrup) and tropical juices.

And if you can’t decide what to eat, the Sindhu Signature Plate boasts smaller portions of three of their most popular dishes: the duck tikka malabari, the beef lali mirch masala and the creamy lobster, drenched in thermidor sauce.

Elsewhere, the Glass House in the Grand Atrium offers a heavenly seven-course tasting menu and wine pairing (priced at around £35 a person), by award-winning wine expert Olly Smith and acclaimed Spanish chef Jose Pizarro.

Our highlight was a black tie dinner and show at the adults-only Limelight Club, with a performance from singer Jonathan Wilkes and a nightclub boogie on board.

If that doesn’t convert you to a cruise lover, I’m not sure what will.