Addison would know. As a gender nonconforming person, they don’t conform to any preconceived notions of how a non-binary person should present themselves. It’s why they have teamed up with GAY TIMES and Hinge to address the misconceptions non-binary people face.

As the founder and CEO of Break the Binary, a consulting firm which provides DEI and LGBTQIA+ training and supportive services to organisations, schools and businesses, Addison is using their platform to normalise the variety of LGBTQIA+ experiences and identities. 

In celebration of Non-Binary Awareness Day, Addison shared their answers to the Hinge NFAQ (Not-so Frequently Asked Question): “Does being non-binary mean looking androgynous?” 

First things first, Addison says there is no one way to be non-binary. “Non-binary people come in all shapes, forms and expressions,” they explain. “But there’s an expectation that non-binary people owe you androgyny.” 

So why do people think being non-binary means looking androgynous?

As with any marginalised identity, there are a lot of preconceived notions about non-binary people and how they present themselves, including that being non-binary means being androgynous. 

“This stems from binary expectations that women owe you femininity and men owe you masculinity,” explains Addison. “But isn’t that pretty limiting?” 

It is indeed. It also misconstrues what it means to be non-binary. This is because non-binary is actually an umbrella term for anyone whose gender identity doesn’t comfortably fit the binary of man or woman.

This means that while someone might identify as non-binary, their identity doesn’t necessarily fit some preconceived sense of gender expression. For example, non-binary people might feel like their gender is fluid, sits somewhere between being a man and a woman, or completely rejects the notion of gender completely. 

There are other considerations, too, such as access to resources. As Addison says, not all non-binary people will be able to remove hair and gendered body parts. “And more importantly,” they add, “we shouldn’t feel pressured to.”