Some people think that in order to be funny, stand-up comedy needs to be in your face, controversial and full of vulgarity. On the contrary, comedian Tom Papa has been making a career out of clean comedy for over three decades now since his days performing as an opener for Jerry Seinfeld in the ’90s to the early 2000s. His third Netflix special, “Home Free,” highlights his lighthearted anecdotes about family, pets, self-esteem, social media and overall musings in life. Papa’s new one-hour comedy routine, recorded in Washington, D.C., is out on Tuesday.
Aside from over 30 years of stand-up under his belt, Papa is also an accomplished author, actor and podcaster, with his culinary conversation-based “Breaking Bread with Tom Papa,” where he has insightful conversations and details the the meal he and his guests share and enjoy.
Papa recently spoke with The Times about his unique style of clean comedy; how he handles empty nest syndrome with his daughters going to college; his many pets, including the “so-ugly-he’s-cute” family Pug named Frank; and his second love of cooking and baking bread and how his culinary skills intersect with stand-up.
In your new Netflix special, you do a lot of material about your daughters going to college, leaving behind your wife, you and the pets. Overall did you have a positive or negative experience?
I guess I had a typical experience with my daughters going to college, that so-called empty nest syndrome. But I’m not sure. When the first one went we were crying for a month. It was a two-year time span. But then the second one left and we found ourselves making dinner reservations and kind of excited about the whole thing, like I thought to myself, I can do what I want when I want and I can actually enjoy things once in a while, without being on someone else’s schedule.
In the new special you literally say “s—” two times, and there is no vulgarity, offensive material or controversial topics. Was it a conscious decision for you to do “clean comedy”?
It was never a conscious thing I had to think about at all. The best comedy has to be true to who you are, no matter what. And honestly, I don’t really speak that way in my real life, so to throw it into my act would seem forced and weird. Now in the early ‘90s, when I was a younger up-and-coming comedian in New York City, at first, I did think I had to be dirty and edgy to keep up with these other guys during that time. But even the audience could tell, when performing crude nasty jokes and using profanity, that it just didn’t fit my personality; it wasn’t who I was and they got that vibe. They were looking at me with weird looks. I just figured, hey, there is so much vulgarity in society. My act should be something of a higher quality than some kids I heard cursing up a storm in the playgrounds in New York City. People laugh. I think I do well with it. It’s just me being who I am.
Your daughters left you and your wife a zoo of pets from birds, lizards, cats and dogs. But in your new comedy special, you do some material about your family’s pug named Frank. Can you tell us more about him and why you love that pug so much?
Well first off, all pugs are so funny and weird-looking, especially in their face and body structure, that yes they are sometimes so ugly they come out looking cute. When you look at them from afar some of them really look like they have major issues. But then you get to know them and they are, in my opinion, the perfect pet for the comedian. Rarely are comedians the beautiful people, and this is true of pugs among dogs. This is why I feel they are the best dogs for comedians. Our whole lives, as comedians we’re looking for something funny and it’s easier to laugh at the world and make people laugh, when you wake up with the face of a pug staring at you. You have to laugh. These little guys have their own personality for sure, but we love Frank, I mean he’s literally part of the family.
Keeping with the notion of clean comedy, you will rarely, if ever perform jokes about politics, controversial issues or divisive topics. Did this also come organically for you as a stand-up comedian?
Oh, yeah, absolutely. I never wanted to talk about that stuff. I have always been attracted to talking about personal things, family life and the bigger questions of just being a human being. I just love mining that stuff in my stand-up comedy and my writing, and my podcast. I just wonder what it is to be a human and what makes us all humans. I do discuss politics a little bit in my life, but I feel like in comedy there are lots of other comics out there who are more skilled at that approach and I’d rather watch those guys who are great do that and be great at my own style.
With political commentary in general, even in comedy everyone feels like they need to express their opinions and that’s fine. I support freedom of speech but I think only 2 percent or less offer anything productive or thoughtful or funny to the issue. I’m not one of those 2 percent. I just keep doing the material I know and love.
I understand you love food, and have a podcast about baking called “Breaking Bread.” Are there any similarities or parallels between the world of comedy and food?
Yes, there are. I named my podcast breaking bread because I’m huge into baking bread and I love to host dinners and get-togethers. I’ve always enjoyed it. I thought it would be perfect to just talk about the food we all love. We all have drinks before enjoying a meal and I bake bread for every guest to open up the conversation and literally break bread over conversations. It’s one of the things in life I live for, it’s a passion of mine. I do it all the time. The podcast is growing. We just had Jimmy Kimmel on, Sara Silverman and more. We have Jerry Seinfeld in a future episode. People are realizing this is just a safe comforting place to talk and enjoy bread, food, drinks and conversations. I really love what this is growing into. It’s super exciting!
As for food and comedy, the end result in both is similar is that you’re hosting people you’re entertaining with either your food or your jokes and you want them to escape their lives and smile and enjoy themselves. Also, the process of cooking and baking is just as humbling as comedy. I’ve been doing both for a long time and it’s always a new experience. Anything can happen at a show or baking bread at home. You always have to be humble about your craft. It is not a thing you can pin down, you can get better at it, but will never be 100% perfect. No one ever nails 100% of every joke on their acts all the time, baking and cooking is very similar in this regard. Even when you have a dull show or bake a bad loaf you gotta dust yourself off and learn and do better next time.