The Democratic National Convention had many high points: Michelle Obama’s instantly classic definition of Trumpian entitlement, “the affirmative action of generational wealth”; Hakeem Jeffries’ faux-intimate “Bro, we broke up with you for a reason”; Vice President Kamala Harris’ defiant pledge, “We are not going back.”
But the most moving moment for me, and I wager many others, was what happened during vice presidential nominee Tim Walz’s acceptance speech Wednesday. He and his wife had struggled with fertility issues, he said, and their long path to parenthood had inspired his daughter’s name, Hope. Watching her father, Hope, 23, mouthed the words “I love you” and made a heart shape with her hands.
“Hope, Gus and Gwen,” said Walz, “you are my entire world, and I love you.”
With that, 17-year-old Gus — cheeks streaked with tears, face contorted with emotion — was on his feet, pointing to his father and exclaiming, “That’s my dad!”
It was a beautiful moment — and a reminder that while some politicians pay lip service to valuing family, others show that they do.
I’m always struck by the way President Biden radiates unconditional love for his family. While some parents understandably cut off adult children who lie, cheat and steal as they struggle with addiction, Biden’s support for his troubled son Hunter has never wavered. Even in the midst of Hunter’s criminal trials and investigations, he has appeared at his father’s side in many highly visible settings — including on the convention stage — powerful testaments to the strength of their bond.
I used to love seeing photos of President George H.W. Bush and his wife, Barbara, in bed and surrounded by unruly young grandchildren at the family‘s summer home in Kennebunkport, Maine.
Resurfaced comments by Republican vice presidential nominee JD Vance put the campaign spotlight on family in a very different way. The Ohio senator snarkily asserted that the Democratic Party is controlled by “childless cat ladies” and that people without children don’t have a stake in their country.
Vance and his wife have three young children, and yet the only anecdote I have heard him relate about any of them is one he recently told a podcast called “Full Send.” He said he was in a hotel room with his 7-year-old son, who is “going through a Pokémon phase,” when Trump called to offer Vance a place on his ticket.
“So he’s trying to talk to me about Pikachu, and I’m on the phone with Donald Trump, and I’m like, ‘Son, shut the hell up for 30 seconds about Pikachu,’ ” Vance recounted. “ ‘This is the most important phone call of my life. Please just let me take this phone call.’ ”
Shut the hell up?
Listen, we’ve all lost patience and popped off at our children, but who among us actually boasts about talking to a young child that way?
When it comes to family vibes, the Trumps are sui generis.
You never know what’s going on in someone else’s marriage, but to be married to him would be to live in a state of constant humiliation. Here is a thrice-married man, after all, who has been found liable for sexually assaulting a woman in a specialty store dressing room; who has boasted about grabbing women by the — well, you know; who said he would date his own daughter if they weren’t related; who allegedly had sex with a porn actor while Melania was home with their infant son.
Melania’s public froideur toward her husband is the stuff of viral memes and late-night TV spoofs. One chilling video from his inauguration caught her smiling at her husband and then frowning as soon as he turned his back.
And was I the only one who picked up on the way Trump recently pit his children against each other? Last month, at his Miami-area golf course, his youngest son, Barron, made his first-ever appearance at one of his father’s rallies.
“Welcome to the scene, Barron,” said Trump, who asked his son to stand. When the crowd cheered for the young man, who recently graduated from high school, Trump said, “You’re pretty popular. He might be more popular than Don and Eric. We gotta talk about this. Hey, Don, we gotta talk about this.”
I don’t care if he was “joking.” That’s a lousy way to treat your sons.
At least two of Trump’s family members — his niece Mary Trump and her brother, Fred Trump III — have written books that portray him as a damaged narcissist. During the publicity tour for “All in the Family: the Trumps and How We Got This Way,” Fred Trump, whose son has a developmental disability,, told ABC News that when he asked Donald Trump to replenish his son’s medical fund, Trump replied, “Your son doesn’t recognize you. Let him die, and move to Florida.”
The former president has denied the story, of course, but are we really going to believe that from the guy who dismissed war heroes as losers, said he didn’t want to see amputees in a military parade and mocked a disabled reporter?
Trump has a family, sure. But unlike Biden, Walz, Bush and many other fathers, you would never call him a family man.