All I want is to feel close to her again, but every time we get intimate it feels like a chore and she refuses to talk about spicing things up.
I’m 52, she’s 49 and we’ve been married for 20 years.
Over the last few years, the sexual spark between us has died.
We often go weeks, if not months without having sex, and when we do it feels as if she can’t wait for it to be over.
Every time it’s the same old missionary position and it’s never fun or spontaneous. She even tries to avoid kissing and foreplay too.
I’ve tried to talk to her about experimenting and trying new things but she refuses to even engage in the conversation.
I’m at a loss. What can I do?
Get in touch with the Dear Deidre team
Every problem gets a personal reply from one of our trained counsellors.
Fill out and submit our easy-to-use and confidential form and the Dear Deidre team will get back to you.
You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page or email us at:
DEIDRE SAYS: Keeping things fun and exciting in a marriage long term isn’t easy and can take a lot of time, attention, and love.
The longer you both ignore this issue the worse it’ll get.
Find a moment to talk to her about how you are feeling. Tell her how much you love her and miss the intimacy you once shared.
Take a look at my support pack about Sex Therapy, and ask if she would consider trying this with you.
I’m also sending you my support pack 50 Ways To Add Fun To Sex to help spice things up.