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For lesbians and queer folks, IVF access is about more than fertility

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How to pay for IVF

“If there’s any advice I would give to anyone who’s starting IVF whether you’re gay, straight, having fertility issues, you’re single, in a relationship – make sure you save,” says Christina Bailey, a mum of four children she had through IVF. 

“There’s all kinds of costs that pop up. I went into IVF thinking round one was going to work. I now have four amazing kids but I’ve gone through four rounds of IVF. And you could not have told me when I first walked into that clinic that I’d be going through four rounds of IVF in my lifetime.” 

Rounds one and two of IVF cost Christina over $21,000. The egg retrieval alone for rounds three and four cost her $17,500. For rounds one and two, she managed to save up around $30,000 with her wife at the time because they had saved up a lot of money by forgoing a big wedding. 

You could not have told me when I first walked into that clinic that I’d be going through four rounds of IVF in my lifetime.

Genna Jaffe, founder of IVF resource Connecting Rainbows and mum of two babies conceived via IVF, spread the $50,000 cost of her IVF journey throughout different credit cards with her wife. They also had savings they could use, and decided to delay buying a home to put the money towards IVF instead. 

In the US, blood work and ultrasounds will often be covered by insurance – but that’s about it. When this is included in insurance policies, the language used is very heterosexual, Christina says, which places same-sex couples at a disadvantage. “If we were a straight couple we might have had a pass at the insurance coverage,” she says. 

Something she didn’t look into the first time around however are grants, which is something queer couples can pursue.

For example:

  • In the US, there are grants you can apply for to help cover the cost of IVF.
  • In the UK, organisations like Access Fertility are offering refund programmes for failed IVF treatments, but these also come at a cost to parents. 

What should you look out for when paying for IVF?

“Costs can vary from clinic to clinic and person to person,” says Kayleigh. “And, whilst it can feel like time is not on your side, the most important thing you can do to save cost is take your time to do the research upfront. Once you have the information in hand, you should also speak to a few clinics to answer any questions you have before you commit to treatment.” 

“Some clinics offer payment plans, which couples may wish to consider if they do need additional support – however, we have also seen some patients try funding via alternative means, such as asking for family support or exploring bank loan options,” adds Professor Geeta Nargund, Senior NHS Consultant and Medical Director of CREATE Fertility and abc IVF. 

Whilst it can feel like time is not on your side, the most important thing you can do to save cost is take your time to do the research upfront.

“There’s so many aspects to take into consideration so whatever figure you see on the price list is most likely not going to be the final figure,” says Sofie. “Plus it’s the aspect of time. You don’t know how much time or how many attempts you’ll need before you’re able to succeed, if ever.”

“Set a plan with your partner, talk, talk, talk – and bear in mind that it can take time, and ask yourself the question of how much time you are willing to invest in this process,” Sofie adds.  “It doesn’t sound very romantic or sexy but at the same time this process is everything but that unfortunately. You’re very much aware of every single step all the time.”

Head to the Stonewall website for information on how to email your local MP to demand equal access to IVF for LGBTQ+ people.



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