In February 2024 a new term called “rat bride”, caught the attention of TikTok users.
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What is a rat bride?
The term rat bride became popular on the social media platform TikTok in February 2024.
The term is defined as a bride who tends to avoid any conversation about her wedding whenever it comes up.
Couldn’t imagine anything worse”@peachsakinger
This is usually due to being self-conscious, anxious or over-analysing.
A rat bride often feels overwhelmed by the wedding process and the pressure of attention.
What is a Bridezilla?
Unlike a rat bride, a bridezilla tends to obsess over every detail of their wedding.
Their behaviour can be regarded as obsessive or intolerably demanding.
They have likely dreamed of the perfect wedding for years, maybe even since childhood.
So, of course, they want everything to be picture-perfect.
Typical actions of a bridezilla include:
- Forcing people to comply with your whims, even if they’re uncomfortable.
- Putting your desires above everyone else and getting upset if someone says no.
- Declaring yourself the centre of the universe among your social circle.
- Getting upset if someone celebrates a milestone before your wedding.
- Wanting full attention from people who have their own independent lives.
- Making unrealistic and unreasonable demands for time and money from your guests and family.
- Acting like you want a wedding more than wanting a marriage.
While using the term might be seen as a humorous way to joke about weddings, it is important to note that the word is rooted in stereotypes.
Dr Jocelyn Charnas, PhD, Clinical Psychologist, argues that the term vilifies women for having standards and expectations for their big day.
“I am very much in favour of losing the term bridezilla,” she told The Knot.
“It’s denigrating and pathologizing what really is a normal process of responding to a high level of stress.
“And, most basically, it’s a sexist term.”
What have people said about rat brides?
A TikTok user, @peachsakinger, explains in her video: “It would make it so much easier if I dreamed about this day [wedding] my whole entire life.
“But it’s not even just the planning that overwhelms me. It’s the actual wedding day that sounds terrifying.
“I don’t even like celebrating my birthday and I just don’t wanna feel like the centre of attention.
“You may find me in the bathroom having an anxiety attack.”
The clip has been “liked” over 400 times as of February 5, 2024.
Many people have taken to the comments to share their thoughts.
One person wrote: “Oh so it is normal? not just me who isn’t bothered cos it’s too much for me to even think about.”
Another said: “Wow I feel so seen.”
“Girl same, the relief once the day is over is indescribable,” a third added.
A fourth penned: “I cancelled my wedding, it was too much.”