Stephen Page and his husband Mitch were brought to tears when a friend offered to become a surrogate mother and give birth to a child for them so they could form a family.
“It was Christmas Day, of all days, when she said she loved us both and wanted to be our surrogate,” Mr Page said.
“Then a very good friend offered to be an egg donor.
“Both of them were giving the gift of life to us.”
That gift is now a “magical”, four-year-old girl named Elizabeth who has taken to calling Mitch “Dad” and Stephen “Daddy”, so they know who she is referring to.
The women who helped to bring Elizabeth into the world are also part of her life, as they remain close friends of the family.
As the Pages are based in Brisbane, Elizabeth was born through an unpaid, altruistic surrogacy arrangement, the only kind of surrogacy legal in Australia.
A nationwide ban on commercial surrogacy — which is available to prospective parents in several countries overseas — means it is illegal to pay surrogate mothers in Australia.
But all types of surrogacy are back in the spotlight following a call earlier this week by the head of the Catholic Church, Pope Francis, for a worldwide ban on all forms of surrogacy.
Church condemnation
In his yearly speech to diplomats in Vatican City on Monday, the pope declared surrogacy to be a “deplorable” act that exploited poor women.
“I deem deplorable the practice of so-called surrogate motherhood, which represents a grave violation of the dignity of the woman and the child, based on the exploitation of situations of the mother’s material needs,” Pope Francis said.
“A child is always a gift and never the basis of a commercial contract.”
Pope Francis has previously described surrogacy as using a “uterus for rent” and a practice that commercialises motherhood.
The Catholic Church also opposes in-vitro fertilisation, abortion, artificial contraception and homosexual sex, although in a landmark ruling in late 2023, Pope Francis approved blessings for same-sex couples.
The Archdiocese of Brisbane did not respond to the ABC’s requests for comment on the pope’s latest condemnation of surrogacy.
Mr Page, who is a fertility lawyer and surrogacy advocate, said the pope’s comments were hypocritical due to numerous cases of child sexual abuse by Catholic priests.
The Brisbane father said that, in his view, the Catholic Church did not have the high ground when it came to sexual morality.
“It’s a bit rich to hear the Catholic Church, of all institutions, talking about women’s and children’s rights given their history,” Mr Page said.
“They should put their own house in order first,” he said.
However, Mr Page said there were legitimate concerns about women being exploited overseas, with the majority of Australians who pursue surrogacy to create or expand their families going abroad to find surrogate mothers.
He said, in his opinion, surrogate mothers should be allowed to receive payments in Australia, because the current system disincentivises local surrogacy, resulting in more people entering into commercial arrangements overseas.
A Monash University paper, ‘Australian intended parents’ decision-making and characteristics and outcomes of surrogacy arrangements completed in Australia and overseas’, notes that overseas surrogate mothers and the babies they gave birth to had worse health outcomes, including higher rates of preterm births, multiple births, and neonatal intensive care, than babies born via surrogates in Australia.
The researchers found that overseas surrogacy practices included many cases of multiple embryo transfers and anonymous egg donations, which are both illegal in Australia.
Their survey revealed the most common reasons Australians sought international surrogacy were difficulties finding a local surrogate and the complicated legal processes at home.
“Improving access to surrogacy at a domestic level would reduce the number of people engaging with international arrangements and, in turn, reduce the potential for harm,” the paper found.
There were 213 Australian babies born through international surrogacy in the 2021-22 financial year.
This compares with 100 surrogacy births reported by Australian and New Zealand fertility clinics in 2021.
‘A beautiful extended family’
Surrogacy lawyer Sarah Jefford said she felt blessed to become the surrogate mother for two Melbourne dads in 2018.
The podcaster said in her view she was receiving the gift of life just as much as she was giving it.
She said throughout the process she formed an intimate bond with the two dads and her surrogate daughter, who is about to turn six.
“While they gained parenthood and the ability to raise and parent her, what we gained together was this beautiful extended family,” Mrs Jefford said.
“I am her Aunty Sarah and we spend time together, I’ve babysat for her, and we celebrate milestones like birthdays and Christmas together.”
Growing Families global director Sam Everingham said there needed to be a global framework to regulate surrogacy overseas.
The Australia-based research organisation advises governments and families who are considering undertaking surrogacy.
Mr Everingham said some countries had very poor protections for surrogates, but the solution was not a blanket ban on all surrogacy.
He said Australian surrogacy was very highly regulated.
“We’ve got many thousands of surrogates who do so in an ethical manner,” he said.
“The surrogates who carry for them often form strong relationships with those couples.”
Access to surrogacy is more tightly regulated in some states. Here is a snapshot of Australia’s surrogacy rules:
- In Western Australia, a surrogate must have previously given birth to a child, and all parties must demonstrate they have spoken with a counsellor and received legal advice from a solicitor
- In the ACT, NSW, and Queensland it is illegal to seek surrogacy overseas, but those laws do not apply in other states
- The ACT government is seeking to weaken some of its regulations to allow single people to access surrogacy and remove the requirement for an an intended parent to have a genetic connection to the child
Mitch Page said his four years of fatherhood had been a wild ride.
“It’s a roller-coaster isn’t it? Sometimes you’re going up and sometimes you’re going down,” Mr Page said.
“It has been magical and very fun.”
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