A BOYFRIEND feels utterly smothered by having to be nice to his partner and spend some of his spare time with her.
Though initially delighted to have a girlfriend and tell all his mates about it, Jack, not his real name, now feels that the entire enterprise is too much like hard work, and is negatively affecting his lifestyle.
He explained: “I asked her to officially go out with me, but I wouldn’t have if I’d known having a bird was like this. It’s only been a week and already I feel like I’m in prison.
“She texts me constantly, like once a day, asking what I’m up to and how I am, and then gets annoyed when I forget to reply but carry on posting five stories an hour on my Instagram like normal.
“It’s definite stalker behaviour. I’m paranoid all the time that she’s going to have a go at me for normal things, like getting another girl’s number.”
Jack”s girlfriend Nikki, not her real name, has been displaying increasingly erratic behaviour, such as sometimes talking to him about things he is not that interested in and not liking it when he yawns to indicate his displeasure.
He said: “I think I’ll have to dump her. I’m just not ready to be tied down to some mad woman who expects me to enjoy her company when she never talks about stuff like football or other girls’ tits.”