A MAN was trapped in his house for three days while his wife told him about a thing that happened to her at work, it has emerged. 

Tom, not his real name, was forced to listen to something to do with a tuna sandwich and Becky from HR when he returned home one evening, later discovering it would turn into a three-day epic. 

He said: “Fuck, that was boring, but I guess I should be grateful. She once took an entire week to tell me about a dream she had about a goldfish. 

“I have no idea what the point of her story was, but I do know what Becky from HR had for lunch, that there’s some sort of friction between her and Lucy, and what colour her shoes are. 

“I also know the shop that sells the tuna sandwiches is owned by a lovely old guy called William and does pastries. I just don’t think it merited taking three days to tell me.” 

Wife Sarah, not her real name, said: “I hope Tom’s in when I get home because a really funny thing happened with Gavin and the photocopier.”