Bayern paid £104million for England skipper Kane, while Bayer Leverkusen’s new £18m frontman Boniface has been compared to Erling Haaland.
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Cologne coach Steffen Baumgart claimed if he was Bayern boss he would have targeted the Nigerian 22-year-old over Tottenham legend Kane, 30.
But Tuchel believes the comparison is ridiculous.
He described Boniface as “a totally different type of player” – then teased Baumgart.
Ex-Chelsea manager Tuchel said: “It’s good that Cologne’s coach is concerned about our market.
“If we had known earlier, we would have expanded our transfer committee to nine people.”
Nonetheless, pound for pound, and in plain stats, Baumgart has a strong case for backing Boniface as the dream strike recruit for Bundesliga clubs.
Younger than Kane by eight years, he has helped blitz Leverkusen to the top of the table with four goals from their three wins in three games.
Champions Bayern, in second place, are the only other team to have won all their three German top-flight matches this term.
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Three Lions’ record scorer Kane has notched three goals in his four appearances since arriving at Munich last month.
Tuchel said on Thursday the Londoner was already showing he’ll become an “absolute success” for Bayern.
And German outlet BILD claim Kane has quickly established himself within the dressing room as one of Bayern’s three most senior figures.
Thomas Muller and Joshua Kimmich share the honour – with club captain and fellow Germany star Manuel Neuer slipping down the list.
Meanwhile, Boniface has continued his astonishing rise of the past four years.
He notched 23 goals and eight assists in 66 matches as he twice won the Norwegian top-tier title with Bodo/Glimt.
Then he netted 17 times and provided 12 assists over 51 games in one campaign for Belgium’s Union Saint-Gilloise – persuading Leverkusen to splash out this summer.
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