I’m a decent man, trying to make a decent living, but most days it feels like everything is stacked up against me.

I’m 53 and my wife is 52.

I used to have a really good job working for a big pharmaceutical company.

The money, the perks and, I’ve got to admit it, the kudos were great.

My wife lapped it up and loved telling everyone about how well I’d done.

But three years ago I got made redundant.

It was a shock but I adapted and retrained as a plumber.

To be honest, I was delighted to find a less-pressured job I could manage.

But my wife was unhappy.

She kept trying to push me into finding another well-paid job within the pharmaceutical industry. When I refused, she started to make little digs and even called me names like “loser” and “lazy”.

So while I’m much happier with my work, my home life is desperate. We sleep in separate bedrooms and barely speak to each other.

Our children have both left home so it’s just the two of us.

My wife is also under enormous pressure from her nursing job and has been given anti-depressants, but she is reluctant to take them.

I would love to get a divorce and start over but I’m not sure we could afford to live separately. I’m so low because I really can’t see a way out of this situation.

DEIDRE SAYS: You have done well to retrain and find work you find fulfilling and I’m sorry your wife has been unsupportive.

It sounds as if money worries and pressure at work are blocking her from being able to appreciate any of the benefits of your new job.

Naturally, you feel hurt.

Fear and panic are likely underpinning her attitude towards you, yet calling you names is completely unacceptable.

It would certainly be worth trying to talk to a therapist about the state of your relationship. Search tavistockrelationships.org, who can provide a reputable counsellor.

A counsellor could help you see how to support each other, and either rekindle your relationship or go your separate ways with dignity.

Read my support pack on Debt Worries to help you both, too.