Books play a huge role in many people’s lives, helping them explore the identity of character, and sometimes helping them to figure out their own. In terms of LGBTQ+ representation, books allow us to delve deeper into the experiences of LGBTQ+ characters, sometimes in a way we can’t through film and TV, and several of my friends have even realised that they might not be straight by discovering a relatable character in the pages of a book. 

For me, books didn’t initially contribute to my realisation that I wasn’t cisgender. Around two years ago, I started using the term genderqueer to describe myself, but within the last year I’ve begun to question my gender identity again. This process of reassessment and rediscovery is what I’m calling my mid-queer crisis. 

This is where books come in. Reading has always been my escape, my safe haven, and the thing I spend most time doing. Once I realised I was LGBTQ+, I started seeking out books with more diverse representation, and since the start of this mid-queer crisis, I’ve specifically been searching for books with characters who are either trans men or identify somewhere under the non-binary umbrella. Though this period has taken lots of emotional energy and mental space, these novels have been helping me, piece by piece, to puzzle together my identity. 

Cemetery Boys by Aiden Thomas, one of the first books I read with a trans main character, Yadriel, helped me realise I relate to a lot of transmasculine feelings, which I was unaware of before, but had always been in the back of my head.

Sixteen Souls by Rosie Talbot, where the internal dialogue of protagonist Sam is absent, made me realise how I want to be seen as masculine by people and how much better that makes me feel.